45 | the whole world stops

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"He's not here

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"He's not here."

I'm out of breath from the short run to Calum's front door, and it's embarrassing how much it pains me to know that run was for nothing.

"You're kidding," I gasp. "Please tell me he didn't do something stupid like run back to the Big Island."

"Run—" Calum catches himself. "Lex, no. His mom asked him to watch the house this weekend so he's staying there."

"Jesus, you scared me."

He smiles down at me, amused. "Our man."

I roll my eyes. "Neither of our man. We're atheists."

"What are you doing here? Last I heard, you literally ran away from the boy."

Part of me wants to run off so I can head to the house, but Calum has been one of the most supportive friends since I met him all those years ago, and I know he'll crown himself as our biggest cheerleader.

"I don't know what I'm doing half the time," I sigh.

"Neither do I. It's okay."

He shifts his weight from one foot to the other, watching me stand there helpless. My grand plan of barging into the house doesn't exactly pan out like I pictured it would in my head, but I'm wondering now if this is a blessing in disguise. Being near the ocean, hearing the sounds of the crashing waves and feeling the saltiness of the air on your skin, gives one all the courage they need sometimes to just go for it.

"You should get going. It's getting late."

I pause and send him a quizzical glance. "How was he this past week? Was he angry? Upset?"

He leans one arm against the doorframe. "Why don't you ask him yourself?" Calum looks me up and down. "Isn't that the point of you driving over here?"

"Come on, Cal," I beg. "I need to know what I'm getting myself into."

His face conveys his sympathy, but it's clear he doesn't have the answers I'm looking for. Or more so that he's aware he's not the one who should be giving me these explanations.

"Trust me, Alex. I think you're better off finding out for yourself. But if it makes you feel any better, I'm rooting for you." He gestures in the direction of where Zach's parents' house is, and the last of a setting sun catches the bronze of his kind eyes.

"You're making it sound like I'm about to run a marathon."

"I don't know, man. If you ask me, these things are harder than running a marathon." Calum crosses his arms over his chest and takes a step back into the house, making it clear he's about to cut this conversation short. "Don't sell yourself short."

"Thanks, Cal. For everything. For always being there to listen to us and tell us when we're being stupid and making us feel like we can do anything."

"As much as I hate to turn down a good compliment, I'm not the one you're here for. Go find him."

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