So what now? We've reciprocated our love for each other

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DoOver: (Nag Hammadi Is Where They Found the Gnostic Gospels) So what now? We've reciprocated our love for each other

Jess's Point of View

"I love you" I said, standing there felt like hours passed with her just staring at me. I wanted to walk away. I wanted to say I take it back. But there the words were between us. She finally stops piercing her blue eyes on me and says "I think I'll take up your suggestion of sitting down"

She begins walking towards the gazebo and I wasn't sure if she wanted me to go. Hell I didn't even know if I wanted to follow but then I see her turn back and tell me with hopeful eyes "Your coming right?" I put my hands in my pocket and as we sit on the gazebo. We sat there and I ran my hands through my hair as a nervous habit that I could never stop. She rubbed her hands on her thighs. And all I could think of was wanting to kiss her and forget all about this last year. I feel like I should say something more but what more can I say. I finally hear her speak once more

"Even though I'd imagine great partings lines never did I ever think after the way you acted the whole day that you would come up with that"

She doesnt even look at me as she says these words. She fixed on the spot on the floor and it doesn't look like she is going to gaze anywhere else. She continues "I hadn't been in this position in a long time. When Dean said it I was sitting down and I sat there and stared at him blankly because I wasn't sure if I loved him. I still don't know if I ever really did." she shifts in her seat and I clench my jaw at another yet comparison to Dean. I knew I shouldn't interrupt her once the rambling began, she wouldn't be satisfied till she said everything.

"And this whole year I've just I've..." I see tears beginning to spill "I've been trying to forget you I tried to go on dates. But the whole time I sat there wondering what sarcastic nicknames you would create for these bozos who couldn't tell the difference from Jane Austin to Patty Smith. And I hate that you always come to mind. I hate that I still want your opinion on everything. I hate that my thoughts can't escape you. I hate that I can't hate you for leaving the way you did..." She finally looked at me and tried to wipe the tears. "I knew you were leaving I saw the duffle bag I could've stopped you. Well I mean at least try too. But...I obviously didn't matter in the decision"

I finally interrupted her "You did. You mattered a lot on my decision"

She nodded at me and sniffles. "So what now? We've reciprocated our love for each other."

"We did?" I say fishing for her to say the words that began this whole conversation.

She smiled and rolled her eyes. It was nice to see her smile around me. It actually melted me. Made the cold air of Connecticut feel like a warm breeze. Then she says "Well if everything I just said didn't spell it out for you. Your dumber than I remember Dodger." her eyes sparkled at the familiar nickname. I lean in and our lips finally meet after so many words so many feelings so much time. Her forehead leans on mine. And though I wish the kiss hadn't ended. She whispers "I love you"

I couldn't help but smile. "I love you" I repeat.

She smiles back "I should probably head back my mom probably fainted of starvation and I was suppose to get her food" she stood up and stared at me.

"We can do long distance. If you know your willing" I say wanting this not to be end. "I'd like that. A lot." she bites her lip as I stand up and we kiss again.

"I know New York isn't 22.8 miles or anything"

She shakes her head still smiling "It doesn't matter"

We kiss again. Me not wanting her to go back to her mother and her not wanting me to head back to New York. But I felt in my gut we'd figure something out this time.

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