Yours Truly

15. Word Vomit

It felt like a scene from a movie. Sera was standing in front the car staring at a shocked yet fuming Tristan, Elena stood a bit far behind Tristan, her hand covering her mouth in shock, and Sera assumed Rowan was still standing on the driver's side of the car behind her.

Word vomit.

The scene from 'Mean Girls' suddenly popped into her mind and she finally understood the feeling of word vomit that Cady felt when she told Aaron that Regina was cheating on him. She felt it coming, yet she couldn't stop it. All she felt after the words had left her mouth was pure horror. More tears streamed her face involuntarily and she couldn't imagine Rowan's reaction, she didn't want to.

"What in the actual fuck..." Tristan said it all too slowly, as if still processing. Sera saw from the corner of her eye Elena slowly trailing her way towards them but she ignored it.

It's too late now...

Sera gathered up whatever courage was left in her and turned around to face Rowan. He had a hard expression on his face, completely unreadable. Sera met his eyes and tried to have a silent conversation with him, trying to convey with her eyes what her mouth cannot explain at the moment. Her eyes were pleading and her expression in pain, softly apologizing for what she said yet asking him to just please go with it for now.

Surprising her, Rowan nodded his head slowly, giving her the okay to go on with whatever she's about to do. He understood her. Sera's expression turned to one of relief, a look of determination passed briefly before she turned back around to face them.

"Sera..." Elena's tone was one of warning.

"You guys can go back and tell dad whatever you want." Sera finally said.

"Sera, we're not telling you-..." Tristan started but was cut off by Sera again.

"I'm really done hearing whatever you have to say about me, Tristan." She fixed the strap of her bag on her shoulder, turned around and opened the passenger door of Rowan's car. "You can take your opinions and shove them right up your asses." Sera's eyes locked with Elena's for a moment before she got into the car.

To her surprise, Rowan did the same thing and started the car without saying anything. Leaving Tristan and Elena standing there, still in shock.

Sera felt more tears prick her eyes as Rowan started driving. It was silent for a while, and she tried to hold back her tears yet they were stronger than her. What overwhelmed her more was that she did this to Rowan without even asking him, she felt that maybe he went along with it because he didn't want to embarrass her in front of them, but what if he wasn't okay with it?

She felt disgusting because not even did she do this to him and stepped over a boundary, she had turned into one of them, one who would lie just to spite others and infuriate them. She absolutely gained nothing from what she did back there. They were surprised, yes, and she had shut them up. But for what?

Her tears had gotten more intense and she couldn't restrain her sobs anymore. Sounds of pain travelled from deep down her chest and into the tense atmosphere of the car. She felt like she wanted to disappear and never come back again.

Tears blurred her vision but she could feel the car slowing down and coming to a halt somewhere. Arms enveloped her and cradled her head to a warm big chest. She immediately welcomed the hug and put her hands around his bicep, holding on tightly as she cried more.

"Is this okay?" He asked, his voice so close to her ear that she wanted to hum in content.

Sera nodded her head against him, still unable to form words.

"I'm so sorry." She sobbed.

Rowan only shushed her as rubbed her back comfortingly. He smelled really good.

"I didn't mean to," Her voice was shaking and she was hiccuping and stumbling over her words, feeling pathetic, she went on, "You don't have to go along with it, I'm so sorry, I don't know where it came from." She moved away from him in order to see his face, keeping her hands around him still.

"Sera, it's okay." Rowan's hands cupped her cheek, "I'm not upset, I'm not mad." He comforted her worries. "I wouldn't have went along with it if I didn't want to, please calm down." His eyes were very genuine and sweet, his voice calm and soft. She had never seen him wearing this expression before.

Sera calmed down a little but remained worried. She couldn't believe that she put her supervisor in that kind of situation. She was so embarrassed.

She sniffled slightly after her tears had stopped and met Rowan's forest eyes hesitantly, ashamed.

"Who was that guy?" He asked.

Sera licked her lips nervously, "My sister's fiancé." She whispered, suddenly feeling exhausted.

"Okay, I won't ask more questions." Rowan started moving away from her but Sera quickly held on to him again.

"I'm sorry." She said, again.

"Stop apologizing." He said sternly, and a shiver went down her spine.

"I could stay with a friend tonight." She mumbled, almost to herself, since it was already late by now and she sure as hell wasn't going back to her apartment.

"What friend?" Rowan asked, the question was unusual and Sera furrowed her brows as she answered.

"My best friend, he lives a little further a-..."

"He?" Rowan suddenly asked.

A heavy pause shifted the atmosphere. Rowan looked tense and Sera looked back at him, confusion in her face.

"Yeah?" She answered.

When Rowan still looked tense, not knowing what to say. Sera went on, "He's my best friend, I've known him for three years and I've stayed with him before, don't worry." Sera tried reassuring him but suddenly felt as if that only made things worse.

Rowan mumbled something under his breath that Sera wasn't able to hear, turned his head to the side, glared at nothing in particular, his adam's apple bobbing before he apprehensively turned the car back on.

"Address?" He asked, his tone hard.

Sera gave it to him, and he started driving.