OUTSIDE - a post-apocalyptic novel

Chapter One

Chapter One - RILEY

Pa is a black marketeer. Nobody and everybody knows this. Pa pays people not to rock the boat. He pays the guards, he pays the neighbours and he even pays his friends. He pays off just about everyone – a litre of whisky here and a bag of sugar there, and in return we live a life of ease and comfort. Pa believes in the carrot approach just as much as the punishing stick. As long as he doesn’t draw too much attention to himself from the wrong quarters, we’re safe and free.

Pa can get his hands on just about anything from before. If you’ve got a craving for a pot noodle he can probably magic one up from somewhere. But it’ll cost you all you’ve got and more besides. He isn’t swayed by threats or tears. He’ll hold fast and stare you down and if you can’t pay you might get a bullet in your head, or worse.

This morning, my parents are standing together in the doorway of the sitting room. Behind me, the sun floods in through the windows and they edge closer to avoid squinting into the too-bright light.

Their faces are ghost white and Ma’s nose and eyes are pink and swollen. She shivers and her teeth chatter as though she’s chilled and it isn’t the warm July morning it appears to be.

‘Riley, can you sit down?’ Pa asks.

‘Okay,’ I say. They’re acting weird. It’s freaking me out. My legs are heavy wood and I’m not sure I can make the three feet required to reach the sofa.

‘Okay,’ I repeat. But I don’t move. I just keep looking from one to the other and they stare back almost as if they’re afraid of me.

‘Riley, sit down,’ Pa says.

I walk to the sofa and sit in one corner with my hands on my lap. The leather is cool against my legs in the warmth of the room. Fear has travelled up from my stomach to my throat and I can’t swallow. I feel sick.

‘Riley,’ he says, running his hands slowly through his hair.

‘No!’ Ma loses it. She sobs and stumbles towards me. Sits and buries her head in my chestnut curls, rocking me backwards and forwards, moaning and muttering. I can’t breathe she’s holding me so tight.

‘Sweetheart, let go, you’re crushing her. Go and lie down upstairs if you want. I’ll tell her.’ Pa’s voice is soft and broken. It doesn’t sound a bit like him.

She lets go of me, cups my face in her hands and kisses my face all over. ‘No, It’s alright, I’m alright,’ she says not taking her eyes from my face. ‘I'm not leaving my baby.’ She leans back, trembling. I press my hands back into my lap and she wraps her arms around herself, still shivering and rocking.

Our house has always been a light and happy place. I don’t understand what’s going on. My face and pyjama top are wet from Ma’s sticky tears. I let my mind wander for a minute, away from the awful strangeness of what’s going on and I hear the low background hum of the generators overlaid by the familiar whirr and thrum of a copter hovering overhead.

Has my father done something wrong? Are we in danger? Do we have to leave the Perimeter? All the most awful things I can think of crowd my brain. And then … Skye! Why isn’t she here? My little sister is usually up before me. I hesitate, not wanting to pose the question. Maybe she’s too young for this conversation and they’ve sent her out of earshot. She won't like that; she’ll kick up a real fuss. But then I would have heard them arguing and everything has been quiet this morning; abnormally quiet up until now.

An unwanted thought creeps into my head and I push it out quickly.

‘Where’s Skye?’ My voice sounds high pitched and distant, like my ears need to pop.