Montana and Natasha were inseparable. Until the day they weren't.
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Montana Belmonte-Rowe sees her acceptance into Harvard as a fresh start. Still haunted by the tragic death of...
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CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
I THINK I'M FINALLY CLEAN
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NOW THAT BISHOP IS OUT OF THE HOSPITAL, THERE ARE ONLY TWO THINGS LEFT IN MY TO-DO LIST FOR MY FRESHMAN YEAR OF COLLEGE. One of them is the most obvious one, reminding me I still have to pass my finals, no matter how badly I want to spend my afternoons playing snooker and getting my ass kicked by Veronica (though I suspect she can easily do it in her sleep). The other one, which isn't any less important, is to finally talk to Natasha.
It's not as easy as it sounds and I spend a lot of time cursing my past self for not having done it sooner, when everything was still fresh. If I had confronted her about everything we've put each other through right after Christmas' Eve, things would be solved by now, but I decided to put it aside and focus on other stuff, such as keeping it all to myself and letting it boil.
It's frustrating.
The only thing that makes it worse is how I feel like I can't talk to anyone else about this, knowing they'll probably think I'm overreacting, that there's no reason why I should be this scared of Natasha, but they'll agree I should have had this conversation with her months ago. I can try to come up with excuses all I want, but they instantly fall flat because no, there's no plausible reason as to why I didn't sit her down and poured it all out to her earlier.
Thus, all I can do is pretend I'm not bothered, just like I've been doing since the beginning of the year, and try to stay focused on things that truly matter, such as all the studying I haven't done, especially because Natasha certainly won't take my finals in my place.
We keep dragging ourselves from lecture to lecture, from study rooms to the library, and I can safely say I had never seen the Weld Hall lounge as empty as it currently is. It's also my new favorite place to study, as the vending machines are still there, despite the alarming lack of students, and I can easily remain hydrated and focused.
Not that it always works, unfortunately. Some people seem to have had the same idea as me and I groan, gathering my stuff and cursing all of them for not knowing how to keep their voices down and respect those who are actually trying to work; I lose plenty of precious time by doing this and, seeing as it's a common occurrence, I can already feel my hard work being flushed down the drain.
