Carnival Souls

Why We Can't Be Friends

Lira banged on Atlas's door until her hand throbbed, the leather bracelet clenched in her fingers. The little girl answered mid-knock and Lira nearly hit her in the head with a balled fist.

Atlas glanced at Lira's half-raised arm. "Everything all right?" she asked.

After her talk with Bebinn, Lira had fled to her room in a state of panic, tearing at her hair until it was hanging haphazard from her braid and screaming into her pillow until her face was beet red. Finally, her frenzy had brought her down the hall to Atlas's room.

"No!" Lira snapped. "It's not." She stormed into the room, pacing to the far end of the threadbare carpet and whirling on her heel. She brandished the bracelet, its jade stones winking mutely in the candlelight.

"What's wrong?" asked Atlas. "What is that?"

"It's something to keep me from becoming a deranged monster like Baleros," said Lira, breathing heavily.

Atlas's face puckered in puzzlement. "Lira, why are you so angry? Isn't that a good thing? You don't have to be afraid anymore."

"Did you tell her? About my fears—did you tell her?" Lira demanded.

Atlas made to guide Lira to a chair, but Lira pulled away from her grasp. Atlas gave an annoyed huff. "Yes, I mentioned your fears to Bebinn I could see how much it was troubling you and I thought she could help."

Lira clapped a hand to her forehead. "Why did you do that?" Lira asked, even though Atlas had clearly just explained. She walked backward until her legs hit the bed and she sat down. The beaded bracelet was pressing into her eye, but she didn't care. The bed sank an inch when Atlas sat next to her. A small hand alighted on her shoulder.

"Lira, I don't understand why you're so upset. I was just trying to help."

Lira took a deep shuddering breath and spoke into her hand. "Bebinn wants to experiment with the music on other spirits. She thinks because the kelpie responded to it, she can use it to capture others as well. The bracelet is the price for me helping her."

Lira hadn't thought it could get much worse than what she already did, but Bebinn always seemed to prove her wrong. It wasn't that she cared about the spirits necessarily—her emotional capacity had been maxed out on the stolen kids—but if her soul was already on its way to being damaged, what would Bebinn's experiments do to it? Despite her promise that the bracelet would save her?

She knew Atlas hadn't intended for it to turn out this way. But again, Lira's fate had been determined by someone else's choices. First her parents, then Genzel, Bebinn, and now Atlas.

"I was only trying to help," said Atlas again. Her voice cracked ever so slightly. Lira looked up and saw that the girl's eyes had a glassy tint. In all her years here, Lira had never seen Atlas's mask crack. She reached out and took the little girl's hand.

"You couldn't have known," she sighed. Her anger cooled and fear seeped back in.

"I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you," promised Atlas. "And now, you have protection. Bebinn could've forced you to comply without giving that to you." She took the bracelet from Lira, who had a sudden desire to snatch it back as if her soul would decay and fester the minute she let it go.  A horrible thought had dawned on Lira.

"Bebinn only gave that to me because she needs me. I'm no use to her if I'm a twisted monster."

Atlas handed the bracelet back, her crimson eyes somber. "Don't worry. If she needs you enough to care about preserving your soul that's a good thing. Otherwise she would have—" Atlas trailed off.