Carnival Souls

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There were no words for the emotions brewing in Lira as the carousel turned under her feet. She gripped one of the outer poles, watching the carnival pass by for the last time.

In the distance was the two-story fun house where she had slept and cried and hoped for so many years. A dull gleam bounced off the upper floor mirrors, the balcony where she had first met Owen, perhaps a year ago now though it felt like ages.

Most of the tents on the thoroughway had collapsed in smoking heaps, their lights extinguished, though Vivian's red tent with all its colorful drapes was among the few still standing. Vivian herself, with Lydia tucked between the barrier of her arms, was watching them with a sad smile while the little girl looked on with solemn eyes.

Lira's heart twisted again seeing her face shining with tears. She had thought Lydia would trust her enough to come with her, but what was half a year of stolen nighttime talks and secret desserts compared with an entire life built around this place with Bebinn as mentor and mother? She wondered if the little girl hated her as much as Atlas did and her heart twisted a little more. She gave Lydia a last smile that the girl did not return and then they were moving past and Bebinn's body was coming into view.

The witch looked almost peaceful, lying in a patch of flattened grass. Again, Lira felt that choking sensation she had experienced when first approaching Bebinn at Zabaria's feet. It was as though she knew she should be relieved, glad even, but was repulsed by the idea of being so. Bebinn had not deserved what happened to her as a young woman and Lira could not feel joy in her demise, even if it meant her freedom. She could not shake the feeling that in a different time and place, she may have liked Bebinn, maybe even admired her.

And the thought she was most scared to admit was that she did not know who she was outside of Bebinn's carnival.

At least now you have the chance to find out. It was enough to chase away that feeling for now.

A rough, callused hand gripped her free one and squeezed. Lira gave Owen a tired smile and squeezed his fingers back and then released her grip on the pole to offer her hand to Mitsi, who took it and stepped forward to stand even with them.

The three held onto each other as the carousel picked up speed and their surroundings melted into a blur of color that condensed into black. Wind lifted their hair and instinctively they widened their stances to brace themselves against the momentum. The blackness stretched and then separated into the dark trunks of trees as the ride slowed and creaked to a stop.

The sweet, earthy smell of a recent rainstorm hit Lira first and she took a great deep breath until her lungs couldn't hold anymore and she exhaled it in a rush. The heaviness of the Spirit World was gone. The night was uninterrupted darkness, no flashes of light, no haze of purple or orange, and a full moon hung low over the tree tops, peeking out from the gaps in the clouds. They were back. They were free.

I'm not a servant anymore. The thought echoed in Lira's head. I won't have to bring kids to Bebinn's Carnival ever again.

It hit Lira all at once and she began to cry, dropping Owen and Mitsi's hands to try and catch the tears. The salt burned her dry lips and the moon turned to a silver smear in the sky. She blinked rapidly, trying to clear her vision and letting her eyes adjust to the darkness, the forest taking shape around her. Embarrassed, she brushed off the boys' comforting gestures and mumbled, "Jacks. Genzel."

She went to kneel beside Jacks and was immensely relieved to see that his eyes were open, though they were glazed with pain.

"How do you feel?" she asked.

"Like a roast chicken," replied Jacks. His voice was all smoke and scrape, but if he was making jokes that had to be a good sign. Lira checked the binding on his stomach and allowed her hope to grow when she saw the bleeding had slowed. But the burns on his arms and neck were worrisome and the sound of his breathing wasn't much better.