Harry Potter and the Biggest Lie Ever Told - Drarry

~3~

FINALLY! Sorry that this chapter took so long to finish, but now it's here! I had a writer's block on the first part and it took me like a week before I just skipped it and instead I wrote it at the very last. Some parts aren't that good and others are better, but I hope you will like it all!
How does everyone feel about it soon being Christmas?

*****

Leaning forward, he pressed his broom to go faster. He had just spotted the golden snitch and now he was going to catch it. The wind was cold against his cheeks, and as he got closer he couldn't help but imagine racing, a red-dressed searcher on his side. Believe it or not, but Merlin, did he love competing against Harry.

Quidditch was just one of many things he missed, it wasn't the same when you didn't have your team with you. Therefore he was happy that soon, he would be back at Hogwarts. No matter how much it scared him, he knew it couldn't be worse then all alone at the manor.

His hand closed around the golden ball, the third time that night. A smirk laid on his lips, he flied downwards and unmounted the broom.

After he had placed it away he started walking against the house. It was still some hours until he had to eat, so therefore he went to bed. Sleeping some hours, he was able to refill the energy he would need for the day.

At breakfast it was as uneventful as always, his mother wasn't going to join in and instead the pale boy sat very much alone. With a book in one hand he got through breakfast.

During the summer it all had been the same, he had just been going through the motions, faking it some how. As he sat there he started humming on a song.

Every single night, the same arrangement
I go out and fight the fight
Still I always feel the strange estrangement
Nothing here is real, nothing here is right

(If anyone regoncied this, pls comment!! Would make me happy)

After breakfast he had spent some time in his room, before he dressed in muggle clothes headed to 9 3/4.

He had arrived early by choice, not wanting to talk with anyone. Mounting the train he choosed a compartment in the very end of the train. Sitting down with a sketchpad he made himself comfortable, and continued with a flower he started on earlier.

*****

Next night he would sit in another bed. That was what hunted Harry's thoughts as he sat in the bed, starring down. Tomorrow they would take the train to Hogwarts, and he was scared. He was also ashamed, he shouldn't be scared of going back to the school. But everything that had happened there? Just thinking about it made him shudder.

The two last days he hadn't been able to get any sleep, and this night wouldn't be better. The nightmares hunted him, and no way that he would close his eyes. He just couldn't do it. Everything seemed so wrong and scary.

He weren't able to save anyone, he never had been. Already from the start, he had been the cause of so many deaths and so much pain. It was to late to change everything, but neither did he seem to be able and do anything better. He just kept bringing pain and despair everywhere around him.

Watching his room his eyes fell on his truck. Immediately he thought about one of the things that was packed, that thing that only he knew about. But it was in the bottom, he couldn't pack it up without having to repack everything. Luckily he had placed one higher up, and he immediately took up it, a light razor blade together with a bandage.

Quickly but as quiet as he could, he headed in the direction of the bathroom.

As quietly as possible he walked into the bathroom and undressed. In the bathtub he sat down after he had placed a bandage next to it. The tears were running down his cheeks and he pressed the blade against his forearm, dragging it parallel to an old scar.