DEREK'S MATCH (DEREK #1) SAMPLE, NOW PUBLISHED

25. someone else

I don't really know where to go. I just know that I don't want to be outside. I'm not in the mood to party anymore.

I look down at my feet as I make my way into the house and up the stairs. There is no one upstairs; I'm sure Derek has some rule about not coming up here. I'm glad because I don't feel like being around people. I go into the guest room where I stayed the other night. I see my bag on the couch. I open the curtains and turn off the light then I lay on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. The moonlight comes in through the window, illuminating the room.

I can still hear the music and commotion going on downstairs but it's not like I'm trying to sleep.

I think about the last time I encountered jealousy. It was when I was with Kevin. He had a friend at the gym he would occasionally mention in conversation, but it wasn't until I saw him with her one night after their workout, that I felt jealous. She was perfectly fit with toned arms and abs on her stomach. She was hot and I suddenly didn't like that Kevin saw her almost every day of the week.

It's so stupid how we get jealous of people that are prettier than us as if cheating on souls didn't exist. Yes, cheating physically is horrible, then there's the other kind of cheating. Emotional cheating. I think it's worse when someone cheats on you with their soul. When they talk to someone and tell them things they've never told you. When they grow a connection with someone that they can't explain to you. To me, that is cheating too.

I wish I was one of those girls that don't get jealous. Or do we all just pretend that we don't?

I lay on my side and face the other side of the room. I wish I was sleepy but my eyes are wide awake. Sleep can't relieve me right now.

I don't know how much time passes before I hear the door behind me open. Light comes in through the crack and I panic for a moment, wondering who it can be, but I don't move.

"Gin?"

I hear Derek close the door. I feel his presence. I consider pretending I'm asleep but I don't want to. I won't get any sleep without talking to him first.

"Are you asleep?" he asks, closer to the bed now.

"No," I say without moving.

"I was looking everywhere for you," he says as he walks around the bed. "I thought you had left."

"I just got tired." I lie.

He sits at the end of the bed, next to my legs. "Are you mad at me?" he asks softly after a moment.

I gulp then I sit up, facing him. The room is dark, except for the moonlight. It's hitting the side of his face, his blue eyes have never looked bluer. We look at each other for a moment. I don't really know what to say. At the end of the day, there is just one thing I want to know.

"You're not over her, are you?" I ask, looking into his eyes.

He reaches out and places his arm around my waist, then he pulls me closer to him until our faces are inches apart. "Gin, you're my girlfriend. I'm with you. I may be a lot of things but I am not a cheater."

"Who said anything about cheating?"

A frown appears on his forehead. "Well, isn't that what you're worried about?"

I speak without thinking. "I'm worried about falling for someone that is still in love with someone else."

His look softens and he reaches out and puts a strand of hair behind my ear. "I know I can be a complete asshole. I don't always make the right decisions but I always know what I want, and you're who I want to be with. You're who I want, Gin."