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Adore's P.O.V.
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I've been home for 2 weeks now, and I still feel the same: like absolute fucking shit. I've broke about 3 phones in the span of 14 days. I've been so sad, angry at myself, ashamed. Just so many overwhelming emotions. I can't fucking take it. I go into my notes on my phone to write down my emotions into a song. Once I open up the app, I see one of my old notes.

 Once I open up the app, I see one of my old notes

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Damn. I forgot how intense my depressive swings can get. Usually I would delete these notes once I feel better, but I keep adding to it. I feel exactly like how I felt when I wrote this note. Like I'm just extra space. Something that needs to be removed from the world. No, not these thoughts again. Make it stop. PLEASE MAKE IT STOP! Fuck, I can't take it anymore! I go into me and Roy's room, open up my underwear drawer, and grab my secret bottle of pills. I haven't used these things in a long while, but I need them. I just need to feel like anything except for how I'm currently feeling. I pop 2 of them, and just wait for the effects to kick in. And boy do they kick in. I feel all woozy and numb if that makes any sense. Damn, I forgot how good these feel. I hear the front doorknob start to rattle, and I immediately hide the bottle back in its place. The door opens, and Roy comes into the house.

"Baby, I'm home!"
"In here." I say, trying to hide how high I was.

Roy comes in, and gives me a quick kiss on the lips.

"How you feeling?" He asks me.
"Better, I think." I say, lying through my teeth.
"Good. I'm glad. You wanna watch Judge Judy?"
"Um..not right now. Maybe later. I kinda just wanna be alone right now."
"Oh, ok. I'll be in the living room if you you need anything."
"Okay. I love you."
"Love you too, Chola."

I hate lying to him.

A/N: Hey y'all! I'm doing some shorter, more interesting chapters for a while. It'll be easier on me because of my school schedule, and it will get more frequent updates out. Just letting you know!

- Paige 🍜

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