You Must Fall In Love

Chapter Forty-Four

Had she ever really applied herself to anything before?

The more time Christine spent at her desk, arm aching, fingers shaking from frustration, the less she could answer that question. The fact was that she couldn't remember a single time in her life where she had really stuck at something, pushed at it despite the fact she didn't like it.

Why? Well, her mother had told her that she would be married by the age of twenty-one. And that was something she didn't like. And because she didn't like it, she had decided to not do anything about it. As if by being pigheaded enough, she could overcome destiny.

What was the point of trying if everything was predetermined, laid out in the stars or in the palm of your hand?

"There are no straight lines in this life. Only transitory points which we wander through, like moths around a firefly."

"How many times do I have to tell you? Your fortune says that you'll be married by the age of twenty-one."

Lawrence's perfect amulet looked at her, all elegance and smooth flowing lines.

She stared at her latest attempt, cursed aloud, then crumpled it into a ball and threw it violently aside. The space around her was looking more and more like a minefield every second, only the mines were paper and the dangerous explosive was actually her head.

"This isn't working!" she yelled, even though there was no-one there at all. "It's been three days!"

She jumped up, threw herself on the bed and kicked the sheets like they were personally responsible for ruining her life. Then she rolled over on her back, tried to kick the air, gave up when she realized that it would be far too hard to do it effectively, and at last flopped into her favorite starfish position, which she christened her Position of Optimal Frustration.

She wanted to stay there for the rest of the day. She didn't want to do anything.

If you stay like this, then there won't be an end to it. You'll be stuck for the rest of your life.

She didn't want to do anything. It wasn't how she worked. Never mind the rest of her life!

Get up.

Christine lay flat, breathing into her duvet, until at last her sheer frustration pushed her off her stomach and back onto her feet.

She hated copying, but she hated feeling useless even more. If that was what it took to get her back on her feet, then she'd take it, and the long-term consequences could go dunk themselves in a lake.

She shoved her butt into the seat and picked up her marker.