40 - Kiersten

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I suggest Matt and I go to Chellie's for milkshakes. It's been about three weeks since his injury and the season has since ended, which I know was hard for him, so I want to do something to cheer him up. Physically, he seems to be doing much better, but I don't know, he seems off. He's completely shut down half the time and barely says anything to me anymore. When I ask him a question, I have to ask it at least twice before I get an answer. He takes hours to respond to texts, if at all. Before he got hurt, we used to text for hours at night, sometimes until we both fell asleep. But lately, he goes radio silent the second he gets home from school and just...never gets back to me. The next day at school, I'll ask why he never texted back, but all he says is that he was "busy." Busy with what? I'll ask, but the only thing I get back is a "just busy."

It's not like him.

"Hey," I say and reach across the table and shake his arm.

He's hardly touched his milkshake. He took one sip when we got here and has spent the rest of the time staring out the window, brooding.

"You're wasting a perfectly good milkshake."

Matt snaps back, but not completely. He has this blank look on his face, his shoulders are slumped, and his mouth is in a slight frown. He doesn't even attempt to fake a smile.

"Sorry."

He takes one more sip for my sake, but then he pushes it aside and goes right back to brooding.

Like I said, this is so not like him. I thought maybe the milkshakes would whip him back to his old self and get him talking, but nope. Still ignoring me. The silence draws on and it starts to make me nervous that maybe I did something wrong.

"Hey," I say and shake his arm again. "Are you mad at me?"

"What?" He says, seeming completely shocked by the question. "Of course not. Why would I be mad at you?"

"I dunno," I shrug my shoulders shyly. "You haven't been talking to me much."

He hangs his head and bites his lip. I get the feeling he knows he's been distant and feels bad about it, but still can't quite express why.

"I'm sorry," he says. "It's not you. I've, uh, got a lot on my mind, that's all."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, not really. I'd rather not talk about it. Or think about it. You wanna get outta here?"

"Oh," I say. "Yeah, sure."

I'm somewhat disappointed that my milkshake rouse didn't work, but hey, at least I know there is something. And it's not me. Hopefully, anyway. He could be lying to spare my feelings. Or, omg, what if he's been quiet because he got himself a girlfriend and doesn't know how to tell me? And the reason he's been distant is because he knows his new girlfriend would never tolerate him having a girl best friend. It all makes sense now. The light is shining down on me. I've been busy. Yeah, I bet he's been busy all right. That little sneak.

Omg, Kiersten. Get yourself together. I would know if he had a girlfriend. I would definitely know. There's no way he'd keep that from me. But then again, Bridgette and Teddy hooked up behind our backs for months without any of us noticing. So, it is possible...

"You coming?"

My head pops up at the sound of his voice. He's already halfway out the door and I'm sitting here descending into paranoia like a weirdo.

Get it together, girl. Get it together.

"Huh? Oh, yeah."

I rush after him and catch up with his stride, but still, we feel out of sync. He walks along, leading us back home without saying a word. I try to gauge what he's thinking through quick, non-noticeable glances. He's pensive. Lost in his own world. What's he thinking about? A cute girly-girl in a short skirt? Her coconut shampoo? Her giggle?

Wait.

I think I know.

"Are you dating Olivia Gulliver?" I blurt out.

Nice. Real subtle.

"What?" He laughs. "No way."

He smiles at me and chuckles, like it's so totally out of the question. On the one hand, I'm happy he's smiling again, but, you know, I could have done without it being at my expense. Is it that crazy to think he'd be dating Olivia? I don't know his type, but let's be honest, she's cute, blonde, and demure. That's pretty much every guy's type. Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me if he already proposed to her. He'll be 16 in December. It's perfectly legal as long as he has parental consent. All they have to do is wait a month. Not that I think Mr. Purdy would agree to that, but you know, whatever.
"I mean, you took her to Homecoming."

"Oh, so that must mean you're dating Porter then?"

"What? No. Don't be ridiculous."

Me and Porter. Yeah, right. Whitney and Bridgette already set me straight on that one. Just say no to Porter Henderson. Now that I think about it, someone with glasses might be cute. Maybe a little reddish tint in his hair. And being athletic wouldn't hurt.

God help me, I just described Matt.

"I'm being ridiculous?" He laughs. "You're the one accusing me of secretly dating Olivia Gulliver."

"I'm not accusing. I'm just saying."

"I promise you, I'm not dating Olivia Gulliver, but thanks for the laugh. I needed it."

Hmm, okay. I guess he's telling the truth. But he did say he's not dating Olivia Gulliver, not that he's not dating in general. Him having a girlfriend is still a very real possibility. My mind is racing as it runs through our school roster when I hear the tiny ping of Matt's phone. I know I shouldn't, but I lean in ever so slightly and take a teeny-tiny peak at the message on his screen. It's from his dad, so okay, so far so good.
But wait a minute.

Emily's gonna give you a call at 3:30

Emily? We don't know an Emily. Is she from out of town? No, she can't be. How would they have met? They must have met somewhere, because there she is making plans to call him at 3:30, right around the time he disappears every night. That's why he's ignoring me. He's been talking to this Emily person. I don't want to sound jealous or anything, but honestly the nerve of her. Taking up all his time like that. Doesn't she know he has friends? Quite frankly, she sounds possessive.
No, you know what, Kiersten? You're the one that's being possessive. He has a new girl in his life. It's okay. It's fine. You don't need to ask him who she is. Just let it go. I'm sure she's lovely.

"Who's Emily?"

Dammit.

Matt goes wide-eyed and his cheeks flush. I can tell he's embarrassed, but it should be me that's embarrassed. I can't believe I just did that. What is wrong with me?

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have read over your shoulder like that."

"No, no it's cool," he says. "You've, um, met her."

I wrack my brain and think as hard as I can, but nothing comes up. I have no idea what he's talking about. I've definitely never met an Emily. Especially not one that's friends with Matt. I'm sure I would have remembered that.

"I don't think so..."

"Kiersten," he says, turning serious. "Yes, you have."

It takes me a second, and at first, I'm totally confused. Then the light bulb goes off and my jaw drops to the floor. Omg. Omg. No way. No freaking way. I am so dumb. How could I have forgotten? Emily is his mom.

 How could I have forgotten? Emily is his mom

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