In Five Years

Chapter 20

Maddie

Cam has his bags in the back of his dad's car, and the moment that I've been dreading all morning has finally arrived. He's leaving to go back to school.

I don't know if we'll make it, and as much as I want to say I'm being ridiculous it's a genuine fear of mine. Long distance is terrifying. Especially knowing that I won't be able to touch him again, or feel him for a while. I remember how painful it was to go without him for so long.

"I hate saying goodbye," I whisper, gnawing at my bottom lip to try and keep the tears at bay.

"This isn't goodbye though, baby. It's see you soon." He smiles and kisses me gently, butterflies seeming to erupt all at once. "This isn't like the last time, okay? Not unless you plan on ghosting me again."

"I'm not," I reassure him. He arches his eyebrow up as if he doesn't believe me and I hit him swiftly on the chest. "I'm not!" I laugh. "I promise."

"You better not. Now can you stop worrying and kiss me?"

He pulls me back into him and runs his hands down to squeeze onto my backside. I try to savor how he feels. I memorize it. Embed it into my memory.

We've been inseparable the past two days, but it somehow still didn't feel like enough time. We haven't had the opportunity to catch up in years. Two days felt like two seconds.

"I love you," he says breathlessly. "Never forget that, Maddie."

"I know. I love you too."

Cam's dad comes outside with his keys in hand, swinging them around his fingers. "Ready to go?"

"No, but if I don't leave now then I'll miss my flight." He sighs and stares down at me again, his thumb hooked onto the belt loop of my jeans. "I'll call you when I land, okay?"

"Okay." I smile, but my attempts at not crying fail me. A tear escapes out of my eye, but he catches it with his other thumb and rubs my cheek.

"This isn't goodbye." He reminds me.

"I know."

Placing one final kiss on my temple, I watch him head around to the passenger seat and climb inside as his dad starts the car.

This isn't fair. I just got him back and now I have to watch him go again. I'm scared that he'll forget about me, or that he'll go back to Katie. I'm not there with him, so what if he gives into temptation with her?

After they're out of sight down the street I let out a sigh and start my mom's car up, resting my head against the steering wheel. Not even two minutes later I see my phone light up beside me in the cup console, Cam's name on the screen. It's a text.

You're not ghosting me, are you?

I smile widely, and just like that, my worries disappear. He's worried that I'm not going to want this. What happened all those years ago isn't going to happen again. I'm not going to be stupid and let him go like I did before.

Never ghosting you again, baby, I reply with a smug grin. I'm going to call you so much that you'll get sick of me.

Highly doubtful, he writes back seconds later. I just left and I'm missing you already.

I go to type out another text to him, but I get another notification. This time it's a text from Tre.

Can I see you today?

Ah, shit. I knew this would be happening sometime soon, but having to break the news to him wasn't in my plans for the day. Especially on the day that I had to say goodbye to Cam.