In Five Years

Chapter 22

Cameron

"You're going to get your ass beat next weekend if you keep missing those tackles." I smack Ronnie, one of my teammates on the back of the head as I pass him out of the locker room. Before he can hit me back I run as fast as I can away from him onto the field. I'm faster than him, I'm faster than anyone on the team, so he eventually gives up and sends me the middle finger.

"You're a dickhead!" He shouts. "Tomorrow at practice you better watch it during drills. I'm sacking you!"

"Yeah, okay!" I shout back. "We'll see!"

My body is sore and tired, but I haven't been caring. Lately, all that's been on my mind is Maddie. My mood has improved drastically since we got back together, and the coach and my teammates can see that too. Nobody knows why since they've never met her, but they will eventually.

I've been playing the best I ever have. I've made my previous history-made stats even better, and now I can probably agree with everyone else that I'll be drafted. Coach says I'm a shoo-in, and honestly, I'm still in disbelief about it all.

I want to be signed to the Burros. I want to stay as close to Maddie as I possibly can while she's in med school. I know I'd be traveling a lot, but in the off-season when I'm home I can have her all to myself. Maybe I'll buy us an apartment together for her to stay in too. Get her out of the dorms. Will she go to med school at Briarwood? Or will she choose somewhere else to go? Maybe I should rethink what team I want to sign to.

Cameron, calm the fuck down.

I inhale and exhale as I head toward the student parking lot, my duffel bag slung over my shoulder. I knew I'd get like this now that I'm with her, but if I'm being honest, I was like this even when I wasn't with her. I had my heart set on the Burros just to try and get back together with her. I'm crazy about this girl.

And now that we've discovered phone sex it's become almost a daily thing. I can't get enough of this woman. She consumes my thoughts completely. Who knew she'd be so dirty for me? I wish I had figured this out my freshman year of high school before I messed with those other girls. One time with Maddie Davis and I'm certain I would have been hooked for life.

"Cameron!"

I hear my name being called from behind me, and when I turn around I see Katie running after me to try and catch up. She must have been in her dad's office because she's coming from the field.

She's not even out of breath when she reaches me, probably from how much she works out. "Hey," she says. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

I nod and she follows me to my roommate's car which he let me borrow today. I set my duffel bag on the trunk and lean against it to support my back.

"I just wanted to say sorry," she admits. "For leaving the way that I did."

"Why are you apologizing?" I ask. "You have nothing to apologize for, Katie. What happened between us was one hundred percent my fault."

"I know, but I've just been thinking about the way things went down between us and wish I had handled things differently. You didn't sleep with her, and I should have trusted you when you told me that you were trying with me. The truth is that I miss you, and I've been thinking about you a lot the past month."

I can tell this conversation is tough for her to have. She's never been one to talk about her feelings, and I hate the fact that I have to break her heart for the second time. I don't want to tell her that I haven't thought about her hardly at all, because I genuinely haven't. I feel horrible about it.

"Uh..." I scratch the back of my head as she twirls a strand of her long brown hair around her fingertip from being so nervous. "Katie I appreciate you telling me how you feel, alright? But things are different now."

"Different how?" She asks. "You don't want to try and see where things go again?"

Ah, fuck. This is much harder than I thought it was going to be. There's so much hope in those brown eyes. I used to love looking at them, but now I find myself longing for Maddie's blue ones. I've always longed for her.

"I'm with Maddie now," I tell her, letting out a huge breath once I finally come clean. "We've been together for a few weeks now."

Katie's once apologetic behavior does a complete shift, and in seconds she crosses her arms over her chest and scoffs. "You've got to be fucking kidding me." She laughs. "After you sat there and told me that you wanted to try and work things out?"

"Um, I told you I was still in love with Maddie from what I remember," I explain. "I said a part of me wanted it to be you, and that was the truth, but that was before I knew Maddie still had feelings for me."

"And to think I actually came here to try and reconcile things." She laughs sarcastically and rolls her eyes. "You really deserve each other."

"Am I missing something? Did you or did you not leave me in Arizona to come home? You ended things with me."

"Because I wanted you to fight for me!" She explodes. "I wanted you to miss me for fucks sake. To see what it was like to not have me."

"How the hell was I supposed to know that?"

"You're not supposed to know it!" She yells. "It should have just happened!"

Okay, clearly I'm missing something. Clearly, I'm not being considerate enough. I'm not saying what she needs me to, but I can't give her what she needs. I don't want to get back together with her.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, I attempt to start over.

"Katie, I'm sorry that I upset you. I didn't mean to hurt you, and I'm sorry that you got caught in the middle between Maddie and me. That was never my intention. I really do care about you and hope you find someone. You deserve a guy that wants you and only you. Someone that doesn't think about someone else."

She nods and blinks away tears, her arms still folded across her chest. "You're right." She says. "I do deserve better than this, and sorry to say, but I don't wish you the same luck. I hope you regret leaving me."

Okay, what the hell am I supposed to say to that?

"To be honest I started fucking you for the clout." She shrugs. "I didn't mean to catch feelings, but trust me when I say they're completely gone now. I don't regret what happened between us because it made me gain a few extra followers. I'll just chalk it up to a good business decision."

"Wow," I deadpan. "Honestly, Katie? Wow."

"What? It's just the truth."

"You seem bitter but alright."

"Not bitter." She smiles, but it's a terrifying one. A smile that looks like she has something up her sleeve. "Just letting you know that I always look out for my best interest, and I'm going to be just fine. Believe that."

"I have no doubt," I mutter as she begins to walk away from me.

Halfway down the parking lot, she spins around again, the same evil smile plastered to her face. "Oh, and Cameron?" She shouts. "Go fuck yourself."