To Want Endlessly [18+]

Chapter Ten

The weeks following my hookup with Freya were spent with us seeing each other almost every single day. With her around, I felt like she had become my own personal drug and that I didn't need alcohol. Though that doesn't mean I stopped partaking in the bitter liquid. I still chose to indulge myself more than I should, though it was less than before.

Us being in a semi-relationship also doesn't mean that she held her tongue. In regards to my... mild alcoholism, she never really failed to remind me that I have a problem.

"It's like your cologne is just straight liquor, Chance."

That was something she'd often say to me. I knew that pretty soon, she'd probably get tired of my shit. Did I want to get better? Who doesn't when they're battling any type of addiction? It's just hard, though I'd say I'm a lot better than most people in the same boat.

Waking up this morning, I tap my phone which is blaring my seven-in-the-morning alarm loudly. Today marks the last day of vacation I have before having to return to work. It's been a while and now I'll have to work to an oblivion to make back all of my paid-time-off again. Though I suppose it's time to get back in the game. I'm just happy that I also had the option to work from home, otherwise I would have been canned several weeks ago.

The first thing I do is shower, which is new. Since being with Freya, I've actually had the motivation to take care of myself, which means wanting to shower and take part in proper hygiene.

Every once in a while, part of me does wonder if I'm relying too much on her presence. After meeting her, I feel like I've become some type of parasite or emotional leech. Rather than the depression I was holding onto, I've latched onto her as some kind of cleanser or holy being.

Whatever. We're just having fun doing something very casual.

After my shower, I shave the shadow off of my face until it's smooth and clear of the dark stubble. Despite the happiness I've felt for a while now, I still have dark circles under my eyes. Rubbing my mouth after brushing my teeth, I stare at myself in the mirror for a long time. Sparing a smile at my reflection, I take a deep breath. It comes out in a heavy sigh that sounds too tired for my age.

A blaring ringtone comes from my phone and I dash to it, already knowing who's on the other line. "Well, what a pleasant surprise. How are you this morning, pretty lady?"

There's a moment of silence before an answer comes. It's paired with a deep voice I don't expect. "Oh, I'm great, handsome guy. How about you?"

Blinking rapidly, I pull the phone away from my ear to look at the caller ID. Chandler's name flashes across and I sigh in disappointment. This is the first time we've spoken in about two weeks. His wedding preparations have been keeping him busy while my declining mental status and drinking problem has kept me away from socializing.

"Oh, is that not the reply you were looking for?" he jokes, laughing lightly in singlehanded amusement. "Sorry to burst your bubble, but it's just me."

"Obviously." I groan, facepalming myself before settling down on my bed. "What's up, Chandler?"

"Don't sound so disappointed. It's been a while since we've spoken, I hope you aren't throwing our brotherhood away for a lady."

Scoffing at his claim, I fight back a smile even though he can't see me. "Oh please. If anyone is cutting our familial ties, it's you."

"Right, we're both shit at contact. Anyway, that's not why I called you." There's a momentary pause before he continues. "I'm planning a proper bachelor party. One that's actually set the week before the wedding. This time I want to have one that's not used to console you or my assistant."

"I guess you deserve as much as that. Alright, just let me know the details."

"It should definitely be my best man who plans all of this, but I'll let you off the hook. I just want something small. Almost like the strip club time, but I'll let you know once I get everything sorted out." He sounds excited, a lot more excited than I've heard him in a while.

Smiling, I can't help but feel immense happiness for my cousin. He deserves happiness more than anyone. While he comes off cold and unapproachable, I know that he has a big heart. I know him better than most since we've been together for so long.

My phone chimes with another call and I hurry with my farewells. Once I'm disconnected from Chandler, I answer. This time I know it's who I'm waiting for after double checking the caller ID.

"You're late," I humor, standing and walking to my closet. "The more pleasant greeting I had for you was wasted on my cousin."

Freya laughs through the line, the sound twinkling in my ear. Her giggles cease before she speaks. "Oh, I'm sorry. I had no idea I was working on your time instead of mine."

"Apology not accepted. I think I'll need some sort of compensation for this."

Flirting is like second nature for us at this point. Each conversation we have is full of passion, as if we're kids back in high school just discovering romance for the first time. Our texts aren't any different from our phone calls. It sure makes me feel young and rejuvenated.

"Oh? And what would that be?" Freya asks and there's some shuffling on the other end. Based on what time it is, I can guarantee she's making herself breakfast.

"Let me take you out today."

There's silence on the other end and I try to imagine Freya's puckered lips as she thinks. The bonnet over her braids is probably leaning to the side after a night of restless sleep - an issue she faces most nights. She's probably wearing a tank top and shorts, and after hearing my 'compensation', she's leaning against the counter.

It's interesting how much you can learn about someone in so little time.

"You wanna take me out?" she finally speaks, sucking her breath in. "Are you asking me on a date, Chance?"

"And if I am?" Our flirting makes my heart race and I can't help the smile on my face.

Freya laughs on the other end. "Then I guess I have no choice but to accept."

For some reason, I was nervous. I didn't realize until the breath left my lungs and my shoulders relaxed. If she had said no, I almost feel like I would've spiraled, as crazy as it sounds. With these thoughts, something in the back of my head tells me this isn't right; I shouldn't have any thoughts like that.

But I ignore it and choose to be happy that Freya agreed to go out with me. Not just us hooking up, but us forming something more.

"Alright, I'll see you soon then," I tell her. "I'll be over by the time you finish breakfast, okay?"

"Yeah, sounds good. And what type of occasion is this?"

"Dress casual, comfortable."

With a quick farewell, we hang up the phone.