Knowing His Wife

𝟑. 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 ?

Yuvaani

It has been a while since Aarush and his family visited us. I had left with no strength to talk to my parents regarding this marriage thing, so I better go and change into my comforting PJs and a Tee. The best part of Sunday is this - comfort clothes, your room, and just relax !

Well, how to actually relax ! There is so much going in my life, and you know the best part ? I can do nothing but just sit and watch where my life is taking me ! I've never been so helpless in my entire life. Where I can't get to have my own decisions !

Although I've told him to reject me, but I don't want to get married this soon. I'm just 28 soon to be 29 this year and he is 5 years elder to me. How will it possibly work !? Okay, even if we won't take the 'age factor' into consideration, but how can I marry him despite knowing he still loves his late wife.

Thinking of Aarush, I've noticed a few things about him. When I saw him in my living room with his family, he looked good ? I mean decent. Yes, decent. It would be the appropriate word to describe him.

Adding to my list, he's respectful too. When we spoke in the bedroom, he always addressed me as Ms. Yuvaani. To which I was impressed and had an idea of how he must be treating others . He has quite a manly demeanor. He didn't seem to be interested in this marriage either, which implies he's loyal to his wife.

He is a good father as far as I saw him with kids in my living room. His nephew and his own kids want to be around him. And my parents also told me a few things about him, emphasizing on the fact he's a good person and a single dad.

I felt as if my parents are already convinced and they have no issue with him being a single father. I fear that they may say yes to the marriage.

Soon, lunch time approached and I was arranging plates on the table. My parents came and we began our meal. "Vaani, what do you think about Aarush ?" My first bite struck in the midway when I heard Papa asking me.

"He's a gentleman" I replied and had that bite which got stuck mid way, to avoid this conversation.

"You know what your father is asking, reply it accordingly." Mumma stated in an end-of-discussion tone.

"He's a single dad, Papa. How can I marry him ?" I nervously replied. Him being a single father doesn't seem to be an issue for me. I just don't want to marry him as we both refuse to do so. And most importantly, he's still in love with his ex-wife.

"So what's the problem in that ? Many single parents remarry" Papa asked in his it's obvious tone.

"Papa, kaafi kuch sacrifice aur adjust karna padega mujhe. Unke do bacche hai, aur wo bhi kaafi chhote hai. Aur sabse badi baat, wo aaj bhi apni wife se utna hi pyaar karte hai jitna wo pehle karte the. Unki aankhon mein dikhta hai. Mai unse shadi karke unhe move on karne ke liye force nahi karna chahti. Let him be, he suffered a great loss, let him take his time to overcome."

[ Papa, I will have to sacrifice and adjust in many things. He has two kids, and they are too small. And more than that, he still loves his wife like she's still with him. His eyes speaks. By marring, I don't want to force him to move on. ]

"Vaani, nothing in life comes easy. We always have to struggle and sacrifice through things. And you're not looking at the brighter side. That is, the society will not force you to have kids then. He already kids. And about his wife, he have to move on, sooner or later. He can't be like this forever right ?" He replied with every practical answer he could ever get in his mind.

"But he can never love me." I stated the very fact why I was denying to marry him. I don't want a loveless marriage. I want my husband to love me. Be with me. Care for me. Spend time with me. If we have this marriage, none of these things are coming my way.