Cryptic Passions

4-Ruth

I blinked, stepping out of my momentary paralysis and a boardwalk to the past.

"What?" I gasped, not because of the shock but because of how hard I was breathing.

"We shouldn't have dinner tonight," his voice was tight, and I could see his hand fixing his tie that looked completely fine to me.

"Oh..." I muttered, not sure what to say. "You're busy?" I decided to ask, hoping I wouldn't sound too clingy.

"No, it's just that I think we're two different people. We won't go well together. It's not worth a try..."

Of course, he had thought of me as the bitch I actually was. "Okay..." I replied, uncertain of what else to say. My words did nothing to ease the awkwardness that he was facing, so he took it upon himself to describe the issue properly.

"I believe that we both want different things..." his eyes trailed to my exposed cleavage and the side of my breasts. "We want different things out of this relationship..." he finished, his eyes returning back to my face to level with mine.

"I understand..." that you think I am slut and only want to have sex. It's okay everyone thinks that about me I don't even mind anymore.

He stood up and offered me a tight smile. "So we're cool?"

I nodded, unable to actually say anything in the numbness of the moment. His expression eased a little and he left the room as well, leaving me alone surrounded by grey walls and papers.

I slumped down on the chair and gulped. Yes, I had asked him out because of his looks but I had a daughter to take care of. I wasn't interested in a hook-up. That was the last thing I wanted. Well, after looking at him not exactly the last thing but it was still not one of my priorities. I would've wanted to take things to the next level if we'd clicked.

I had blown away my chance with one decent man out of pettiness.

He was hot, but I could tell that he was also really nice. I could sense it in the way his expression had soured when I was annoying Diana.

Simon had been my co-mentor with Caeser for three years. I was like a daughter to Caeser, and of course, in his heart, Simon considered me as a daughter too, but we often talked like we were of the same age and he was my suitor.

The habit had been there for a while. I and Simon often had dinner and threw harmless flirts at each other but he loved his wife too much, and I used to loved my husband too much to let anything serious descend between us.

I only wanted to mess with Diana. Sometimes, one needed to show others their limits, and their positions. I had spent ten years working for E. Y. E, working to get where I was. Some interns had no place calling me names.

Of course, Simon was going to get pissed if he were ever to find out that I'd made his daughter cry, but from what I had heard from him about their relationship, I knew he would forgive me. We had known each other for years, after all.

The main problem was the fact that Christian had canceled our date. He had rejected me.

I had never really tried to actually date a guy, had never asked one out ever since my failed marriage, so his rejection cut me deeper than I would've liked to admit.

Men were always easily attracted to me and I had worked hard enough to get there. I had lost my weight, had gone on a strict diet, and had started working out twice a day and sometimes even thrice to maintain my body.

So what was it that Christian wanted?

He'd thought that I was slut and if he was so damn sure that I wanted to sleep with him, why had he rejected me?