I grab another cookie and stuff it into my mouth. "This is, like, the best cookie ever."
Bitchney gasps. "OH EM JAY! If it's the best cookie ever, then I should have it!"
"Ha! Too late! Already gone!" I rub my abdomen. "It's in my stomach now, along with the pregnant mole rats we caught today."
Bitchney wraps her arms around me. I start to wrap my arms around her too. "Aw, best friends for li--"
She squeezes my stomach. I throw up. Dinner, my dog, trots to the kitchen to eat my vomit. Bitchney drops onto her hands and knees to lap it up along with him. "Ha! Not too late! Still here! OH EM JAY, you're right! Best cookie ever!"
"Girls!" My mom stands in the doorway, her hands on her boobs. "You know you're not supposed to have more than no cookies in one day! They're all for me! I need all the fat I can get to maintain my breasts!"
"You're right," Bitchney and I say. We apologize for eating the cookies, then throw it back up into my mom's mouth so that she can get all of her essential nutrients.
She smiles at us. "There, there. Such good girls. Are you ready for your sleepover now?"
"Yes!" Bitchney and I chime. We sleep in separate beds in our own houses, but whenever she comes over, my mom has a special arrangement for us. She opens up her blouse and we climb in, resting our heads along her boobs. They reach to the ground, so there's plenty of room for us in there.
Once we're comfortable, Bitchney pats my head. "Good night, Mary Sue."
"Good night, Bitchney," I reply.
"BUT WAIT!" she shouts. "I'm sorry for stealing the best cookie ever."
"It's okay." I smile. "That's what best friends are for. You can just poop it out for me later."
She grins. "I know."
And she does the next day, just like any best friend should.
Well, that update took forever. Probably won't update for awhile--as you can probably tell, these stories are rather strange, and I often don't get into such a mindset. Hope you enjoyed.
