There Is No Me Beyond You

~11~

There's no point in crying. My subconscious scolded me some time later, after my sobs subsided gradually and I started to shiver.

It's the fever of course, I remembered, bringing my hand to the wound on the side of my neck. Unlike with Radu the other time, I wasn't bleeding, the wound was clean and already sealed. But from how weak I was feeling and the way my head spun, I knew that Andrei had taken enough blood and sent enough venom coursing through my veins to make it impossible for me to run away, even if the door was left unlocked and open wide.

Also, by having told me that Lucas was dead, he and Alina took away my hope, my only possibility of being rescued. Now, if Lucas... was no more... no one would ever know that I was here. Lucas! My eyes filled with fresh tears and I shuddered; the fever was rising fast.

Think, Samara. Don't give up. My subconscious urged.

I pulled myself to the edge of the bed and stood up on unsure legs. Dressed only in my undershirt I was freezing, the fire burning in the small fireplace was emitting enough light to make it possible for me to see around, but its heat was insufficient.

Looking at the bed and observing the cleanliness and the quantity of pillows and blankets covering it, I concluded that I was definitely not in a prison cell. I was in one of the guest chambers of the castle most likely, a... hostage of sorts rather than a prisoner.

Shivering again I reached for one of the blankets to wrap it around my trembling body but then I remembered my coat. Turning towards the only window of the room I saw it-- the coat was still there, lying in a heap on the floor. My book was there, not far from it, too.

Slowly, carefully, holding on to the bed's long curtains, I descended the three wooden steps of the dais where the bed stood and reaching the window I picked them both up. I wrapped the coat around me and holding the book tightly to my chest I looked out through the glass panes into the night. But it was too dark, all I could see of the world outside was pure blackness.

So I focused on the chamber. There was a small table with a jug and a washing basin nearby, and another one with a tray, a cup and a bottle. Seeing them I realised how thirsty I was, my throat was parched, and I had a headache, too. I remembered the wine, and the willow bark tea Vlad made me drink the other time, but here I did not have even water, all the receptacles were empty.

Swallowing with difficulty I moved towards a small door set into the stone wall to my right, my hopes of escape escalating one instant then plummeting the next, when, opening it, I found a small toilet.

I felt my legs give way as a wave of shivers ran through my body and leaned against the wall until they passed. Then I made my way back to the bed. There was nothing I could do, I had no strength left to move, or think.

Taking my shoes off I lay down, wrapped in my coat. I put my book under the pillows and pulled more blankets over myself, drawing my knees to my chest for warmth, but feeling cold despite.

As I lay in the semi darkness under the bed's dark curtains, my feverish mind kept drifting back to what had happened, making me feel desperate. I knew I couldn't afford to think about it now, I knew it would only make me feel worse, kill my last hope, and take away my remaining strength...

You must think of something to get you out of here... There is still a chance, maybe Alina was wrong, maybe she only said that to upset you... What if Lucas escaped... He might be injured but alive, he might need your help... My subconscious whispered.

Eventually, trembling under the blankets, I drifted off to sleep. Through a haze of fever I noticed someone taking the coat off me some time later, and forcing me to drink. Then I fell asleep again but this time I had a dream.