safe place • lashton (on hold)

• 2 • quiet •

as the boys finished the concert they were all on a high, including luke. they all rushed off, handing their various pieces of stage equipment to the stage crew and running straight into the dressing room where they were all quick to change and get themselves looking semi-normal instead of the sweaty messes they usually were after they performed.

luke was on a high, something performing always gave him. he would be so scared leading up to it but as soon as the crowd started singing his lyrics back to him, he was gone, transported to another place where it was just him, the boys and their audience, nothing else mattered. not his past, not the future, nothing. usually his brain wouldn't dare to give him ten minutes of peace, where his mind is at ease and he is able to think rationally, though this was peace, and one of the only times he would be lucky enough to experience this luxury.

they all celebrated the events prior with a drink, not too much for the blonde because he knew that wouldn't lead anywhere good for him, but the others had a fun time, micheal especially. after this though, lukes mood dropped, but he was prepared for this as it wasn't an uncommon occurrence.

when the young blonde is drunk, he gets clingy, and he always end up in the arms of his safe place, wether that be a simple arm over the shoulder as they used each other as a support, or they were cuddled up in either's bed, most nights ended this way. tonight way different though, ashton could sense it, but he didn't know what was different or who was different.

looking around, he saw his fellow band mates asleep across from himself and the blonde as they sat on the lounge watching a movie. ashton looked towards the blonde and there's where it is different.

"you ok luke?" he asked, luke didn't reply, just kept staring off at nothing in particular. he was thinking about the concert and how he did mess up and how after he saw fans crying, though he told himself they were happy tears and he obviously knew that when he was thinking rationally, but at the time he wasn't. this brought the blonde to sitting there scrolling through the vicious comments on twitter, where apparentally he did everything wrong. every time he breathed, every time he laughed, every time he opened his mouth, he was wrong for one reason or another. usually this would only bother him so much, he was quite used to the constant harassment online because it has been that way for years, though most of the time when he stumbles across them he isn't drunk and alone, nor are they as personal as they were this time.

the only parts of lukes past that are public knowledge are the anxiety, but that is only because of the music they released and the invasive interview questions that are asked. if he had it his way, no one would have a clue, but that's not how it works, especially for him. music was his outlet, much like it is for most who have it as a career. it was his job and he loved it so he wouldn't put it all on the line because he didn't want to share something petty from eight years ago, though most of it wasn't that long ago but he couldn't let the fans know that. they looked up to him, they looked up to all the boys. they were all supposed to be strong role models and luke especially didn't know how to deal with this whilst his mind is all over the place.

"lukeeeeee." the blonde finally acknowledges his presence and looks up at the older boy.

"sorry ash, what did you say?" he asks quietly.

"just asking if you're ok? you seem a bit out of it." to be fair the blonde was drunk, so that explains why he was out of it, but he knew that wasn't the only thing.

"just thinking." luke mumbles and he can see out of the corner of his eye, the sad look on his band mates face but he chooses to ignore it and put his attention back on the movie.