Untainted Desires ✔

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Smiling weakly at her family she close her eyes making the tears roll down from her eyes.

"How are you feeling?"Amir ask and jadwa node closing her eyes do to the excruciating pain in her chest.

She open her eyes and they wander around the hospital room, she spot jawahir by the far end of the room, it's been 3days since jadwa gain consciousness every single day her family spend the day with her at the hospital do nobody has tell her about armaan but jadwa wishes she can see him hafiz has arranged for her treatment and they will be leaving in two days time to los Angeles for the heart transplant.
   She gesture with her hand and farhat step forward, she sit on the edge of the bed and entwined her hand with her best friend.

"Where's farhana?"jadwa say in a whisper and farhat sigh with a weak smile.

"She's at home we will come together later in the evening."farhat say and jadwa node.

"I want to speak to ya armaan
Please beg him to come even do it's briefly."jadwa say and farhat node.

"He will come very soon,
You will be fine insha Allah."farhat say as she feel her vision blurring,

Every single day the Amir family pray for a quick shifa for there daughter,
Hanan barely come to the hospital to see her daughter because whenever she's at the hospital She's always crying wondering what her daughter did to deserve such pain, so she usually spend the day at her grandfather house to take care of armaan who's is gradually recovering.

Jawahir stare from where she's standing, this is the first time she come to see jadwa and she feels really guilty and responsibile for every situation her husband and sister are in, nobody pay attention to her in the family she usually spend her entire day in the bedroom, the few times she try going to see her husband he sent her out saying she's stinking jawahir thought he was pretending just to avoid her but the day she insisted on staying he ended up vomiting saying her presence irritate him, jawahir ended up spending the entire day crying.

"I will be fine."jadwa say to her best friend with a smile, she turn her gaze to everyone and point weakly at jawahir gesturing for her to come, jawahir hesitate and her grandfather node at her to go, she quietly walk to the bed, jadwa hold her hand and pat the bed for her to sit.

"Sit."jadwa say in a whisper in her raspy sick voice.

Jawahir hesitate, staring intensely at jadwa she realize just how sick she look, the heavy eyebag and how sunken her eyes is makes her feel even more guilty for what she did.

"I'm sorry."jawahir say and kneel on the floor as she breakdown.

"I'm really sorry jadwa,
I feel stupid for whatever i did to you,
I was so engrossed with the worldly materialistic things which is even insignificant to life,
I don't know how and when i turn into who i am,I don't know the amount of words I will use to make you forgive me,
I.............jawahir try saying but couldn't find her words, she use her two hands to close her face as she cry with regret.

The room become silent only the sobbing of jawahir echoing around as the entire family stare pitifully at her, jadwa uses the last bit of her strength and sit upright as farhat support the pillow in her back.

"Stand up."farhat say helping jawahir up as she help her sit on the bed.

"I have forgiven you jawahir,
Promise me you will take care of farhana,
she's all i have.
I know she's a little bit temperemental but what can i say she's all the almighty gave to me."jadwa whisper tiredly as she slightly cough closing her eyes do to the intense pain in her chest.

"Grandpa."jadwa say in a whisper and Amir step forward, he hold his grandfather daughter hand with a weak smile and she smile back at him.

"I don't know how long I'm going to survive this, I want you to all know i care about you,
Forgive me for everything I have done to you."jadwa say weakly and Amir smile.

"You will be fine jadwa,
I haven't tell you this but you are my favorite grand daughter,
You will be perfectly ok and come back to us."Amir say and jadwa node with a smile.

The room become so quiet, the intensity of the serenity and how calm the environment is makes everyone weak, after some minutes jadwa says she need to sleep and farhat help her to lay down, the rest of the family leave the hospital leaving farhat and grandpa Amir behind.

"Aunty hanan,
I want to see jadwa?
Where has she been?"armaan ask as he sit upright, of all days today armaan seems to be even healthier.

"You will see jadwa,
Later in the evening we will go and see her."hanan say feeding armaan and he node.

"Where has she been?
Where's my daughter?"he ask and hanan sigh.

"Armaan."hanan call and he answer looking at his aunty.

"There's something i have to tell you."she say and armaan look at her with soo Much attention.

"I'm listening aunty,
Hope everything is alright."he ask and she node.

"Yeah.
But you have to promise me not to panic because everything happens for a reason and we all have to embrace qadr because we can't escape it."hanan say and armaan node.

"I won't panic."he say and hanan node with a weak smile at him.

"Armaan.
You divorced jadwa."hanan say and armaan look up confused .

"Divorced!
How?"he ask confused, do armaan still has some memories of what happened and how badly he treated jadwa but they are only hazy in his brain and he can't even recall divorcing his wife.

Hanan sigh and node, she's been wondering wether it's a good decision to tell armaan what happened and she's already make her mind up to tell him what really happened for the past five years do she won't tell him jawahir did all that but she will enlighten him on the necessary things even do he himself knows a few things he did to jadwa but hanan think he deserves to know just how things where so he can know how to mend his relationship with his daughter and wife.

"You did armaan,
Do it wasn't your intention but you did Divorced jadwa,
I know some times you always complain of weird thoughts that seems like a  deja vu I want you to know a lot happened some you can remember others you find it difficult to recall and I think it's only fair if you know."hanan say and armaan shake his head confused.

"Tell me."armaan say and hanan smile weakly at him, with his gaze on the plate of food he listen attentively to his aunty as she highlights him on his previous hazy mistakes
With every single words leaving his aunty mouth armaan feels every piece of his heart shattering into pieces the hazy part of his memory coming back and he feel his head spinning making him to pass out on his bed.

Two more chapters and we are done.

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