Finding Your Roots

Saying Goodbye

Mom and Dad's flight to San Francisco (stop over for their final destination, NY) was late tonight, and I'm not so sure I'm ready to say good bye yet. I feel like if and when I say good bye to them, it'll be time to move on and things will be real again. Hindi pa ako ready!

My Tagalog is getting so much better, I don't know, maybe it's the Filipino blood in my veins that automatically set my Tagalog in motion. I mean, yes, I need so much help with my pronunciation, but other than that, I think I can set someone straight with this newly acquired skill.

Tito and Tita were going to drive Mom and Dad to the airport, and I think I'm going to tag along with kambal. My parents and Ev's parents are so happy that he and I get along so well. We're pretty much inseprable since the day I moved here just 2 weeks ago. I'm enjoying myself because he's definitely been such a big help in my transition.

Tapos, Mom and Dad have secured my condo in Fort Bonifacio, so I get to move in and furnish the place within next week! That went by so fast talaga. Evan's really excited too because I told him that he can stay with me whenever he needed time alone or away from the family for a little bit! He really is my bespren dito sa Philippines.

I stood outside of the back door leading to the patio and facing the pool when I felt a tap on my shoulders. I turned around, and it was Evan, being that it's a sabado, he was home and not off with his friends. He knew that because my parents were leaving for New York tonight, I'll need all the emotional tulong that he can offer me.

"Ano, kambal, okey ka lang?" He asked.

I looked at him and sat down on the steps outside of the sliding backdoor. "Yeah, ayos. I'm just thinking of how different things are now. Pano if I can't adjust? Do I throw away my life here, too?" I felt him pat my back again and gave my shoulders a squeeze while he sat next to me. His white collared Polo shirt scruffed my bare arm. I looked at him. He was wearing light plaid cargo shorts and a pair leather Rainbow flip flops. I touched the straps of them.

He looked down at what I was doing and pulled his feet away as he chuckled. "Alam mo, kambal, I know for sure that you're going to adjust. Eh, look at you na nga, already speaking the slang of Taglish!"

I chuckled back at him. That was true, I was already speaking part Filipino. "Well what if people don't like me?" I don't like how I'm sounding like a little, hayskul girl worried about the first day at a new school. But I guess that was semi-accurate, I am new to the school, and I am still kind of a girl from high school. I shook my head at the though. "And I'm going to miss my parents. And I already miss Kuya Xavier, Kuya Leo, Ate Lei, and my 2 almost not babies anymore." I added.

In the corner of my eye, I saw Evan look at his Cartier watch, the watch that I knew Lolo gave to him for his 18th birthday, to check the time. He put his arms aroud me before to twisted me to look back at him. "You. Will. Be. Fine. Tara."

-

When we were driving back to Alabang from NAIA, I sat in the back seat of Evan's car. Kiel was in the passenger seat. Evan had asked Kiel to tag along so we wouldn't be called much of anti-socials.

Kiel looked back at me, "Let's go to MOA." I noticed it wasn't a question but merely a statement.

Evan looked at me through his rear view mirror and slightly nodded. "Kambal, you in?"

"As if naman I have a choice, I'm just a passenger." I replied and pretend pouted. I was not complaining because these boys have definitely eased my homesickness.

Kiel and Evan's been best friends since they were in pre-school at Brent and have been inseperable since then. I remember the first time I went to the Philippines with my family back in '04 and I met Kiel when we were around 10 years old. He went everywhere we went, but I think we were all too shy to talk to each other. But since Evan was my bespren and Kiel's bespren, also, all still hung out with each other. Now that we're all older, 18 in fact, we all have gotten past the awkward pre-adolescence phase. And since Kiel's close to his siblings, also, we've also been spending a lot of time with them.

We went straight to Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf after parking underground at The Mall of Asia. I got myself a cup of chai tea latte, while the 2 boys both got espressos. We took a seat next to the window, and Evan started talking. He turned to me, "Atara, I'm really glad you are getting to know my best friend," And then turned to Kiel, "And I'm really glad na you get to meet and know my pinsan at a close level. You two mean so much to me, always know that." I was touched.

Evan and I've always been close. When we were younger, he would come to New York with Kuya Jamie, Tita, Tito, and Lauren. We'd all hang out around the West Side and go travel to upstate New York for some cabin fever! Before Skype was introduced to the international and cyber scene, we would YM with each other and chat non-stop until our parents yell at us to go to sleep. We would also internationally text about each other's live. The thing was, after we turned 14, and when we started to gain different social lives and different views on certain things (nothing major, just boy-girl things), there was a quick halt in our friendship. I think it was just part of growing up was growing apart. We would still Skype when our parents were Skyping, be on the phone when our parents were on the phone, text when something major happens to us, and write on our parents' Christmas cards for each other. What turned us back to our old ways of friendship, I think, was when I went to visit here in Septmeber to take my ACET with him. For 2 weeks, we became inseperable again, and we were back to our old ways of disappearing at malls with each other, making trouble, and definitely pranking everyone around us. We would be awake at 3am and exploring his gated community and sometimes even going to the Alabang Country Clubhouse just to hangout with each other way from the rowdy house. Their house was being renovated around the time I visited, so we stayed in a rented house and lot in the same village. I know how close I am to Evan but hearing it from his own mouth made it so real.

"Alam ko 'yan, dude." Kiel responded. I raised my cup of chai up in the air in a 'cheers' motion when Kiel turned to face me naman. "Ikaw din, you're sarap kasama, Tara." He winked at me. His deep dimples and light complextion made him look only part Filipino. It also makes him look really attractive.

"Kayo, too. You both know my situation, alam ninyo what I'm doing with my life, and to be honest, talaga kayo dalawa are the ones that make it so easy." I added to the parade.

"I'm actually so happy that you chose the Philippines, Tara. Dami mo matututunan dito." Kiel told me, and I believed him. I'm not even just limiting it to academia wise, but also counting the social and culture part of this escapade. "And props sayo, because I know that I wouldn't be able to make that move, kung ako ikaw. I would've chickened out last minute kasi sanay ako sa States."

I laughed. "That's true."

Evan spoke up, "Teka, kambal, what are you going to miss ba the most?"

I rested my chin on my hands. "I don't know. My family, most. My friends, a lot. My house. I think mostly mga physical things. Emotional, not so much. I feel like I'll always be back naman in New York eh. Like whatever I do, balik ako dun."