In Denial | Completed

The first time they met

She couldn't have known that he would affect her this much the first time they met. It was on the day she arrived in Madison, Wisconsin to start her studies and now almost a year ago.

Vanessa had thought it would be the first and last time she would be seeing of him, considering they met at the airport of all places. Somehow, it was an underwhelming and overwhelming experience at the same time.

She never knew that she would have a soulmate, no one did, nor did she had an inkling that something big would be happening that day, like they tend to describe it in books. She was excited, yes, but only because this was supposed to be the first day of her new life.

It was nine o'clock in the morning and she felt like shit, she looked like shit and probably smelt like it, too. Jetlag made anything that was not going straight to the dorms and to bed sound unappealing, but Vanessa knew that it would take hours before that would be a possibility. So, she looked for the nearest coffee shop and was delighted to find one just a stairway down. It looked inviting and didn't really fit into the busy airport atmosphere.

Well, that was how she remembered it looking, but in the last year she had made the experience that she tended to idealize everything that had to do with Vann. That was one thing she hated about all of this. She couldn't even trust her own memories.

So, in reality she didn't really know how this café really looked like. It probably wasn't as recognizable as she thought and the coffee probably didn't taste as heavenly as she remembered.

What Vanessa remembered clearly though, was how confused she left the airport after their first meeting, after their first look at each other and after they both knew – just knew.

She didn't know how long they just stood there, it felt like it was just a second, but she couldn't possibly know. Suddenly she was hyper awake and aware of everything that was him. At least until she remembered.

Remembered that she didn't want chemicals in her brain deciding who she would spend the rest of her life with.
Remembered her childhood friend back in England, who was left alone with her father at the age of six, after her mother had left the country from one day to another to be with her soulmate and never looked back.

Remembered that she didn't actually want a soulmate.

So, she looked away, proceeded to order her coffee and pretended with shaking hands that she didn't feel his stare on her.

And when she turned back with her coffee in her hand, he was gone. She couldn't stop herself from feeling sad, even though she tried to tell herself to be relieved. This was what she had wanted. And what he seemingly had wanted, as well. 

Everything was good, as if she had never even seen him. She wouldn't have to see him ever again.

At least she had thought, until Vanessa saw him for the second time.

It was her first time in building C, where her English lecture was supposed to be held and she wandered disoriented through the halls, when she heard his voice. She hadn't heard his voice at the airport and she still didn't know how she could have been so sure that it was his, but she was.

Not ready to see him again – or, God forbid for him to see her again – she leaned on the wall next to the almost closed door and listened to the conversation. When she thought about it that she essentially had eavesdropped on him, she still had to cringe.

She couldn't place most of the information that she had gathered while listening, but at least she found out his name – Vann.

She had to hold back her snort, when she had heard that. Really? Vann and Vanessa? How idiotic.