Heavy lied the crown of thorns of disappointment and disdain - especially when aimed at oneself - and Mitali could not spurn away the chance to take off that crown, that had presented itself.
"Snigdha, I don't know who I am anymore," she said, panting between words. I have no reservations about doing things I wouldn't normally consider. I-I don't know the manipulative woman staring back at me from the mirror, but I don't want to be her, Snigdha!"
The chords of Snigdha's heart strummed in a pitiful melody for her friend. Her shaky whisper had added to the concern flooding Snigdha's heart.
"It's not prudent to focus on labels, Mitali, as they don't have any inherent significance. It's not sensible to assume that the emotional upheaval you've endured won't have an effect on you or change your outlook. Don't be too hard on yourself!"
"How do I not, Snigdha?" asked Mitali, huffing and letting out a wry chuckle. "I compelled a kind man to try again for a child, despite having an idea what it would to him. These impulses - I-I can't stop them! I want to, but... but I can't! I'm drained from fighting my inner demons, Snigdha!"
Disbelief curved Snigdha's lips as her eyes narrowed. Anurag's description of the situation didn't do justice to how chaotic it really was. Her mind was in a state of confusion as she tried to understand the complete extent of her friend's complicated situation, and a new surge of worry engulfed the young woman.
"Realization is the first step towards betterment, Mitali. As tension fades, impulsivity wanes with the arrival of peace. Just... give it some time! You are much beyond your impulses - dark or otherwise."
The sincerity streaking Snigdha's compassionate words was a gentle caress, distracting her from the agonizing wound of her conscience. They pushed her to indulge in the last offering of hope. Anticipation of the worst remained, even though patience was no longer a virtue she possessed. She wondered if she could allow herself to anticipate the break of dawn.
Choosing the right course of action was never Mitali Pathak's strong suit. The memory of the feverish fear of making the wrong choice had faded because of years without a choice to make.
But there it was. Dormant, but alive; the terrifying prospect of living with the remorse of treading the incorrect path and her impetus to clear the chaos that had housed itself in her mind.
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Shanti Sinha and her pride did not need to hear her granddaughter's demand for her to leave the room. She turned around on her heel and walked out of the room after throwing a piercing glare at the distraught siblings.
Purvi turned towards her baby brother, swallowing the painful lump in her throat. She cupped his jaw with her twitching fingers and her lips trembled towards her chin. "I'm so sorry, Kaddu! You shouldn't have had to endure any of this! I regret not being able to save you from this! This would not happen if I had married again, it is-"
Adhrit held his sister's shoulders, shaking his head. "You saved me for years, Di! Traded your freedom for mine, and doted on me like a mother! No one expected this to happen. You did enough, Di!"
Purvi stepped away from her brother and slumped onto the couch. "If I hadn't suggested about trying again for the child, Mitali's audacious wishes would wither, and you would find some solace and space to grieve on your own, Kaddu! I helped her find a footing," said Purvi, burying her head in her hands.
Adhrit knelt in front of his sister and rested his throbbing head in her lap. Purvi's hands splayed away from her face, and her widened eyes scanned her brother's desolate form to confirm he had indeed returned to share his sorrows with her.
Her numerous attempts to offer her consolation and condolences had turned futile when he refused to meet her eyes. Tears stung at her eyes and her fingers found their way into his hair, caressing his scalp like their mother did before she lost herself to the voices in her head.
"You understood her anguish in a way no one else could, Di. As a mother who lost an unborn child, I know you can relate. I-I understand why you supported her stance," he said, stifling his sobs behind irregular gasps.
"The closure you have been yearning for years was within her reach. You needed the tantalizing touch of your child when you endured the same pain as her, Di, and Fate had been less than merciful towards you. So, you wanted her to gift her salvation. I understood, Di, but I couldn't accept it!"
Adhrit had lifted the proverbial burden off her chest with his mindful words. She had tossed and turned in her bed, fraught with the prospect of losing her brother - the only person to call her own after her mother and Aunt - and bereft of a moment's peace. His understanding had dispelled her fears and her heart swelled with warmth.
"She still had a chance at that bliss! I-I knew how much she needed it! I failed to take notice of your turmoil as my empathy for Mitali overshadowed it. I'm sorry, Kaddu!"
"All of us picked the wrong route to avoid the demons of our past, Di, and fell into a bottomless abyss. We chose ourselves over others, leaving us in a position where we cannot accept or reject apologies. Each of us owes an apology to the other," he said with a regretful smile on his lips.
The powerlessness behind his words tore through Purvi's heart. His appearance of resignation, dejection, and destitution caused a sense of helplessness for Purvi. "And what now, Kaddu? What do you plan to do?"
"I wish I knew, Di. I wish!"
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So many lost souls in this story - each faced with a conflict the other could not comprehend. I don't envy the position of anyone in the story. Please VOTE and COMMENT!
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River & Desert
Romance"There's no need to go searching for a bride, Dadi. We don't need a bride. It's a surrogate that we need. In order to fulfill my obligation, I need a surrogate to bear the heir." **** "We have less than two days left to repay the money," said Mitali...
