Will you be okay?

Chapter 1

Warning! This chapter mentions selfharm.

Raven's mind:

It's going wrong again. I should ask for help. I can't do it anymore. I'm tired. I can't get out bed. I can't wake up. I can't sleep. Sleeping is getting difficult but waking up more. I'm so tired. In any way. It's going bad and I'm falling into the hole again. I keep breaking down when I get home after fighting with the villains. I keep getting mad at my friends for no reason. I don't want to annoy them. I don't want them to get upset. I can't control it. But I'm just so tired, I can't get a break! I'm losing my selfharm streak. I can't do it any longer. I'm sorry everyone.

Beast boy:

I growled when I stretched myself out. I climbed out of bed. "Good-morning to you, handsome." I winked at myself in the mirror while I say that.
I opened my closet door and i picked out some fresh new clothes. I quickly stroke my hands through my hair. I sighed. "Bad hair day, huh? Time for a haircut."

I opened my door. With a big smile I entered the so called living room. "Good-morning everyone!" I said loudly when I see the titans sitting around the table. "Goodmorning, beast boy." Everyone said back except Raven.
She's been acting so strange lately. She hasn't been talking to me for some reason. She's not even looking at me. But why? I need to know.

Raven:

My mind was somewhere else until I heard him. His deep voice made my heart pound faster. "This year he has been growing and he got stronger. He is so tall now. His muscles got bigger and he got so handsome. Oh and his voice.. A few months ago he was so cute and.. Raven what are you thinking." My mind is racing and my stomach is doing flips.

I heard him walk behind me. His hands were touching my waist and they ran slowly across my back. My eyes lit up and my cheeks turned a bit pink. "Mama, can i talk to you, in private?" He whispered. "Hm" I responded. "Please Rae, why won't you talk to me. Did I do something wrong? You're my best friend, please tell me." "Hm.. best friend." I whispered. I can feel the other titans looking at me.
I still didn't look at him. He can not know that I'm falling in love with him more and more. After I got hit by that villain.. my feelings are getting stronger. Not that I didn't like him. I loved him already but it only got worse you know. And not only my love feelings are getting stronger. My sadness got worse and I feel more depressed then ever. But I can't stop thinking about beast boy and his perfect green eyes and that funny looking fang. The way he looks at me.. makes me want to kiss him and-

I got saved by the crime alert.

"It's Killer Moth with Kitten (destiny)!" Robin said while he was looking at the screen. You could see the disgust on his face. Cyborg laughed. "Is she going to ask you out again to dance with you?" Starfire scoffed. I hear Beast boy laugh silently. I looked at him and he instantly stopped. I didn't want him to stop. I love his laugh.

"We got to go now! Before it all goes the wrong." Starfire said while she rushed to the elevator. We all followed her and I was mentally preparing about what is going to happen.

-few hours later-

Beast boy:

"Ray- Ray, talk to me!!" I begged when she walked out of the elevator. I ran after her. "Just leave her, beast. She clearly does not wanna talk with you." Cyborg said while fixing his arm. "Damn, they got me good."
"Raven!" I grabbed her arm. "Let me go, Gar. I can't and do not want to talk to you." She said while trying to get loose from my grip. "But why can't you, Raven. Why won't you look at me!" I felt tears coming up and my voice got shaky. "Just let me go! You're hurting me!!" She screamed at me. I let her go. She quickly floated to her room.

I looked at her closed door and sighed. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. "I miss her, my raven. I'm so confused. I don't like it." I walked to my room and I sit on my bed. Then I just started sobbing. Big crocodile tears rolled down my face. "What did i do. Please. I'm sorry if I said anything that hurt people. Did I hurt her?" I rattled. "She doesn't want me. She doesn't love me, she doesn't want to be my friend." The sobbing got worse.

-30 minutes later-

I heard knocking. I whipped all my tears away. Took a deep breath and stood up. I opened the door and there she was.. looking down, hiding her face.
"What do you want, Raven?" I asked a bit harsh. "Look.. I want to apologize for ignorin- oh. Garfield, have you been crying?" She finally looked at me. "Why would you care?" I looked down. "You're my best friend, Gar.. Look, we need to talk. " "Fine, but be quick." I let her in.

Raven:

I felt him staring at me. "Well?" I heard him say. "Are you going to say anything or are you just going to stand there and do nothing" I knew he was running out of patience. I leaned against the wall and looked at him.

"I can't do it anymore, Gar."

"What do mean?"

"I can not be a hero anymore."

"Huh? Raven you can't be serious."

"I am, Garfield. I am serious. I don't want to be an hero anymore. All I do is hurt people. The good ones. I'm hurting you, the others. I'm tired."

"No, no! You're not hurting me, Rae and you're also not hurting the others. You're doing great." He touches my face. "Listen to me, look at me, Ray-Ray. I don't want to lose you, the other titans don't want to lose you." He gets closer to me. "What's wrong, mama. Talk to me."
I started to feel tears coming up. "It's going really bad, Garfield. My feelings are weird and I don't know what to do. And please do not tell ANYONE what I'm about to show you now." He looked at me with a lot of patience now. I sighed and rolled up my sleeve, revealing all the scars I made.