The Last Handful of Clover - Book 3: The Stone in the Stream

3.44 The Passion of Howard Gunderson

June 16, 4:12 pm

Billy found Richard kneeling alone in the street in front of his house. How long he had been there, Billy didn't know. And he wasn't sure that Richard knew either.

The sense of defeat that had overwhelmed Billy at the university was only aggravated when he looked upon the pathetic, almost catatonic, shell of his friend. And with a heavy heart, he sank down in front of Richard, their knees almost together. But even as he drew closer, it wasn't clear that Richard could see him. His eyes were glazed and distant. And although there were no traces of tears there now, Billy was sure that Richard had been weeping—perhaps for quite a long time.

Gently and slowly, Billy reached out and touched the back of Richard's hand, which lay like a dead thing against his thigh. There was no reaction, which only caused the chill in Billy to grow.

"Richard. I'm here. I'm back. Can you hear me?"

For long moments Richard remained silent, but Billy had the impression that the man had, indeed, heard him. It was clear that Richard was deep in a pit of despair. Billy stared into the man's cloudy eyes, trying to see if Richard could climb out of that pit, or if he had lost all hope.

Finally, to Billy's relief, Richard found his voice. But the boy had to lean forward to hear it.

"They're... they're gone..." Richard said.

Billy sighed, and he felt the worst of the panic release its icy grip. At least he knows that someone is here. And he still has enough will left to put together words.

"Richard... Please... Try to look at me," Billy said. "Focus on my voice. Come back."

And with time, Richard did. It was not quick, and it was not without moments where Billy thought he might lose the man for good. But he did finally come out of the trance that had claimed him.

I have to tell him what happened to Keith and Pil, Billy thought. But I don't think he can bare it. At least, not yet.

"Richard, tell me what happened," Billy finally said, even though it risked putting Richard back into a downward spiral. "Where is Howard? Did you find Justin?"

Richard didn't answer, and it was clear to Billy that the mere mention of those two names was like a knife to the man's chest. The look of pain and loss that twisted Richard's features was hard to look upon.

Billy raised a hand to his friend's face and gently touched his cheek. That touch broke something loose in Richard, and slowly his eyes regained their focus. He looked upon Billy's face for the first time, and it was the look a drowning man might give to someone who had thrown him a life preserver.

"They're gone, Billy," he said. "Howard and Justin. They're both gone."

"Gone where, Richard? Can you tell me? What happened?"

The tears welled up in Richard's eyes again.

"Howard agreed to let me... use him. To use his body to attract Justin. So we could ask him where Drouillard is. God, I wish he hadn't."

"Did it work?" Billy asked, hoping to keep Richard talking.

A sad smile crossed the older man's face, and it somehow made him look even more defeated. "Yes, it worked. Justin came to us. But I was... I was too weak. I couldn't reach him. I begged and pleaded, while Howard held him. I knelt with him, right here on the street... But he was... There was nothing I could do. Billy, there was nothing there. Nothing but hate and fear and malice. I just... couldn't reach him. I tried, but I couldn't..."

The tears were flowing freely now, and Billy interlaced his fingers behind Richard's neck, and leaned forward until their cheeks were touching. Richard reached up and grasped his hands, and for the first time in a century and a half, Billy actually felt the tears of another person, as they crawled like beetles down the space between their faces, before eventually dripping off and disappearing into the empty air.