𝗛𝗘𝗥 » 𝗕𝗧𝗦 𝗙𝗙 (𝗢𝗧𝟳)

CHAPTER 9 » SIDE EFFECTS

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Two weeks passed by so slowly yet in a fast manner. Some days my spirit was high and happy and other days it was low and sad. I am very sure I have felt almost every shade of emotions someone going through chemotherapy feels, the side effects slowly eased into my system and it made each day torturously slow, but seeing as I have gone through a whole fourteen days of it, time must have definitely skipped by really fast.

It feels like it was just yesterday I was told I had ALL (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia).

The first side effect I got was nausea working hand in hand with low appetite. The days my appetite would be okay enough for me to down something, nausea will take over the forte of my digestive system and settle in my throat awaiting its time to shine by pushing out everything I had ingested in form of vomit. And days when there was no nausea, my appetite was barely there making a very delicious food bland in my mouth, my taste buds asleep and not doing their assigned task of letting me feel the sweetness of a food.

And funnily, the hospital food didn't suck as I expected it to be.

By the fourth day or so, I woke up to find chunk strands of hair on my pillow, the horror of what that means washed through me like a flood. I got weary that morning and it made the rest of that day a bad one. Fatigue was on and off, some days I feel energised that I take a walk to the hospital garden and some days I feel extremely tired and weak to even get up from the bed.

It has definitely not been smooth but I had to chide myself every morning with positive talks. I reached out to the medical school councillor and took a year absence explaining in details what my current condition was and I was told I will be able to take off from where I left once I was done with my treatment and they wished me well.

So spending each day in this hospital room, I had to start doing something productive which I am yet to decide on. But I found a haematology course online yesterday and I am thinking to take it and go at my own pace that way I can keep gaining knowledge while I get treated of the same disease.

Today was one of those days that I know won't go well. I will be shaving my hair today and it's Nurse Hana that will be doing it. We've gotten friendlier over the weeks, although I still couldn't keep up with her bubbly personality but I try and she's sweet and caring. Patience when I vent out my frustration of what my day was and that made me comfortable with her. But I'm way comfortable with my darling Prisha who finds time amidst her very busy work time to check up on me, rubbing positive energy on me. Always leaving a smile on my face. She's a sweetheart and a very good friend that I've come to adore.

"I miss 'em." I grumble to myself, snuggling tight under my blanket, missing my boyfriends who I haven't seen any for the past four days because they've been busy at the Label but today, Tae said he had free time and would come check on me. So I scheduled the hair shaving to when he arrives as I'll be needing that emotional support.

Over the weeks, their interaction with me as reduced, not coming over, especially this week and also not chatting very often which I blame on their the busy schedule but it doesn't make it hurt less as they are my rock and those terrible hurting days of side effects dealing with me, I wished they were by my side. At least just one of them being here with me will suffice.

Just a presence of one is enough to sooth my weary soul.

I groan knowing as thoughts about them as settled in my mind I won't be able to nap anymore. Tae is to be here in an hour or so and I was hoping to take a quick nap to calm my anxious mind for the upcoming hair shaving. I didn't want to be a crying mess when I lose all my hair, my beautiful dark curls, bouncy, lush and coily.