A Book Nerd's Guide to Falling in Love

Chapter 12: Cornered

Okay, I could get used to this. Maybe. Parties weren't so bad? That was a question because I was still trying to figure it out.

Finn's party was lowkey. It wasn't like the parties you see in movies where hundreds of kids come to one house to drink, make out, and have sex. Well, the punch had gin, and I did see a couple making out on the back porch, but other than that, it was pretty chill.

After Finn left me in the kitchen, I went to find Lotty. She was with Cathy in a sunroom. Both of them had those plastic cups filled with punch.

"Hey," Lotty called me over by waving a hand.

I stepped into the room--darkly lit in the early evening and, despite being called a sunroom, a little chilly with the autumn cold seeping through the cracks in the window seals. I walked to where they sat on a couch made of natural woven material. I sat on a matching chair, feeling the soft cushion cradle me and noting how perfect the seat was for reading.

"So, what do you think?" Lotty asked.

"What do I think of what?" I returned as I took a drink from the soda can Finn gave me.

"The party." She gestured at her surroundings with her hands.

"It's okay, I guess." I was still undecided. The party wasn't what I expected. Before we got here, I had thought of the things that could happen and prepared for the worst. If a police came to raid this, I'd know which route to run down from this hill. I had imagined myself tugging Lotty by the wrist and dragging her away from Cathy.

"Pretty cool, right?" Cathy said to me, leaning closer to Lotty as if she had read my mind about the tugging my best friend and running away part.

"Yeah, cool, I guess," I answered, trying not to stare and be jealous at how close they were. I took another drink to distract my eyes.

"Lotty told me you don't party much," Cathy added.

I cringed and almost coughed out the soda in my mouth. Lotty didn't have to share that, though it wasn't a secret. I somehow secretly wanted people here to think I was chill or something--a certain someone who was used to these kinds of events. I didn't answer.

"Hey, I remember the first high school party I went to in freshman year. It was Dave's. It was pretty lame, but we all thought it was the biggest thing ever," Lotty said, breaking the awkwardness between us.

I couldn't really remember Dave's party, probably because I wasn't invited. But if I was, it would have been the coolest thing for me too.

"Oh, yeah. I went to that. I didn't see you there, though." Cathy turned to Lotty. They were both facing each other now.

"You didn't see me because you were with someone else," Lotty said, and they started to laugh and giggle as if the discussion was hilarious. It wasn't, and I didn't get it.

I glanced at the cups in their hands and guessed it might have been the gin. I suddenly wished I'd taken Finn's offer, just a sip to get me to relax. Now, I felt like a third wheel again. "Uhm--" I started. "I'm going to go get another drink," I said and got up from the chair despite the can in my hand still being half full.

Lotty turned to me for a moment. "Don't get one of punch!" And then she laughed, and I knew she was a little tipsy from the gin.

I walked out of the sunroom and placed the soda can on a console in the hallway. I wasn't really thirsty, and I had second thoughts about the punch now.

Going back to the kitchen, I hoped to find Finn or someone else I could talk to, but he wasn't there. Dave was still by the counter talking with the three girls, laughing and looking red from the alcohol.