I sit in the back of a truck.
My heart rate is spiking at each interval.
Higher.
Higher.
Higher.
This mission feels different.
It's an odd feeling.
I've gotten used to the guilt. The loneliness. The anxiety.
Something else eats me away tonight, though, as I sway with the truck.
Three words play in my mind:
Kill him quickly.
I need to get in, get out. It should be easy. Fast. Simple.
Honestly!
I need to get a grip on myself. Breathe in. Out. Calm my nerves.
I'm only assassinating an heir, right? He's not the Don. He should have less protection. Besides, he'll be at a restaurant.
Easy.
I've shot many people through restaurant windows before. The bullet flies through the window. Their head drops back. Bloody. Screams. I disappear into the van.
And then I'm transported back.
And do it again the next day.
"Breathe, Lila. You can kill him, Lila. You've got this, Lila." I use my real name because they can't hear me.
I need to ground myself.
I need to associate myself with something.
Anything besides a number.
Number number number
Lila Lila Lila
Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
The truck seems to tilt. I gasp. But I don't fall over. The door opens, and I go into autopilot.
I step out of the truck, and scale the bricks of a building in the alleyway. A gun is strapped to my vest.
The van drives away.
Once I reach the top of the roof next to the restaurant, I kneel down and watch through the window.
I see Alexandre surrounded by his family. Laughing children. Pregnant women. A gleaming elderly lady. A stern man.
My heart aches in my chest.
I have grown up with the promise of having a real family. Someone to hug me, care for me, love, love love love
Me
Me
Me
I'm too hard to love. Too much trouble. Not normal. If only I was normal, my family wouldn't have had to take me to the asylum.
Why can't I be lovable?
Oh, I just want that.
I want to be a laughing child in this family. A carefree person.
Normal. Not crazy.
I
Don't
Want
To
Be
Crazy
My vision warps.
YOU ARE READING
Little Lila
General Fictionstandalone ~ mafia siblings series "She's a monster!" "She's a demon!" "She's a... child." Lila grew up in an asylum. She could see things other people didn't see. Lila was told she was crazy. Crazy people must be punished. The asylum was a cover...
