❝ 𝐆𝐎 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐈𝐓, 𝐆𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓! ❞

𝟎𝟎. 𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒/𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑

These aren't completely accurate to their personalities but I love incorrect quotes so I really don't care lmafo
Enjoy the shitty chaos
Also some of these are spongebob quotes, stuff I made up, or vines
Edit: I forgot to mention the tiktoks.. I'm dumb 😭

Tw: Swearing, Violence

Nate: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?
Guest: Nope, absolutely not.
Archer: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.
Beo: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.
Blu: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.
Lavender: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.

*The squad is over at Nate's house*
Guest: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?
Nate: ... N-No...
Nate, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???
Guest, motioning to their kitchen: Three, I thought!
Archer: I see a-
Nate, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.
Guest: Oh, well I-
Nate: Hey wait wait, actually.. hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*
Nate, amazed: It's got a bake setting!
Lavender: Ohoho, you learn something new every day!
Blu: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?
Nate: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!
Nate: I am someone who owns four ovens...
Nate, louder and way too happy: I am someone... who owns FOUR OVENS...
Nate: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens...
Beo, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!
Nate:
Guest: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four-Five ovens!
Nate:
Nate, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS

'Can I copy the homework?'
Nate: I can help you with it!
Lavender: Yeah, sure.
Archer: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.
Blu: lol nope.
Beo: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!
Guest: *Read 5:55pm*

Blu: Truth or dare?
Guest: Dare.
Blu: I dare you to kiss the hottest person in the room.
Guest: Hey, Archer?
Archer, who wasn't listening: Yeah?
Guest: Could you move? I'm trying to get to Noob.

Nate: On a scale from "damn Daniel" to "fre sha vaca do", how are you feeling?
Grey: In between "It's an avocado, thanks" and "How did you defeat Captain America", but as a solid answer I would say "I don't need a degree to be a clothing hanger". How about you, Archer?
Archer: Probably "road work ahead".
Lavender: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

Lavender: Blu, have you seen my copy of the greatest movie of all time?
Blu: 17 again?
Lavender: Yeah.
Blu: Pretty sure it fell in the hole.
Lavender: What hole? OH MY GOD
*Scary hole noises idk*
Lavender: What is that???
Blu: ...It's a hole.
Lavender: Yeah, I can see that, what's it doing there?
Blu: Well I woke up this morning, (sips coffee) then there was a hole.
Lavender: What are you gonna do about it?
Blu: Well I put a rug over it.
*Dramatic noise*
Blu: Yeah, it fell in the hole.
Lavender: Shall we call the police or something?
Blu: Oh yeah, I called the police, yeah.
Lavender: Well, where are they?
Blu: They're in the hole.
*Dramatic noise*
Lavender: ..Where is your boyfriend?
Blu:
Lavender: Blu, WHERE IS YOUR BOYFRIEND!?
Blu: He's at work.
Lavender: Oh, where does he work?
Blu: In the hole.
*Dramatic noise*
Lavender: GOD! How deep even is this thing?
*Lavender takes Blu's mug and drops it in the hole.*
Blu: That was my favorite mug, now it's in the hole.
Lavender: Blu, do you even know what this is? Like for all we know it could be an inter-dimensional wormhole or.. or a gateway to hell or-
Lavender:
Lavender: Blu? Blu!? *Screaming into the hole* BLU!?!
Blu: Hey, what's up I got a snack. *Bites apple*
Lavender: Blu, will you please take this seriously?
*Hole person emerges*
Lavender: *Unintelligible Screaming*
Blu: *Sh00ts it*
Lavender: What was that!?
Blu: Hole person.
Lavender: Where did it come from????
Blu: 😐
Lavender: Right! The hole! Yeah.. Dude, why are you so calm about this?
Blu: I'm more worried about the space octopus.
Lavender: What space octopus?!
*The space octopus grabs Lavender*
Blu: That one, oh, here it is!
*Dramatic noise*
Blu: Oh shit-
(I wrote this ENTIRE THING 😭)

Nate: Hey Grey,
Grey: Yes?
Nate: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it's on?
Grey:
Grey: Where's Archer?

Beo: Hi, welcome to Dennys, I don't work here!
Nate: I have.. several bees, in the place you would least expect them.
Archer: Could a horse love a man? SHOULD a horse love a man???
Grey: I think I have a condition of some kind and I don't know which one.
^ by hotrobbie on tiktok

(All of these are gonna be Archer)
DAMNNN.. This bitch must be part downtown Atlanta 💀
What is it finna play? .. WOAH
'Fuck you and all yo crew I'm gonna beat yall bitches up when I see y'all' *scared noise idk...* OH MY GOD WHO WROTE THIS???
What's up, what's up, what's up? *Dramatic noise* 😨
Oh my god- ykw? This is really scary..
OOGLY BOGOOLY BITCH
^ Trapcaleb

Lavender: *Walking by Beo's room*
Beo: *Blasting music*
Lavender: *Opens his dorm door*
Beo: *Blasting Cluster by Slipknot* Oh, hey Laven!

Grey: Nate, do you know why I have so many discord dms all of a sudden?
Nate: UHH....
(Nate the day before)
*Looking through Grey's photos because he's bored*
Nate: Oh! He definitely should've posted this!
*Posts the photo on the insta account he's barely active on*
(Present)
Nate: ...I-I have no clue! *nervous chuckle*

(Before Beo and Blu got together)
Beo: Blu?
Blu: Hm?
Beo: Can I-
Nate, screaming from inside the commons: HE HAS A CRUSH ON YOU
Beo:
Blu:
Blu: I like you too, silly.
Beo: *Flustered, looking in Nate's direction*
Nate: *Holding a thumbs up*

(Nat trapped Nate and Beo)
Beo: What just happened?
Nate: C'mon, Beo, give me a boost up!
Beo: Can't we just stay down here where it's safe?
Nate: No way, I created this monster and now I've got to stop him.
(Natalie hits Beo with a wrench)
Nate: See what I mean, Beo?
Beo: Where the leak, ma'am?
....
Beo: AHHHH
(She hits him with a bowling ball and he crashes)
Nate: You okay, Beo?
Beo: FINLAND!

(Guest, Lavender Nate and studying 3 days before an important exam)
Lavender: Anyone know how many days it's been? I lost track..
Grey, wheezing and tired from lack of sleep: 43...

Beo: I just inhaled an entired can of febreeze and I am tripping balls rn..
Lavender: Oh my gosh, why would you do that?
Beo: Better question is, why am I still alive??????

Nate: That's a good start, G!
Grey, tired from playing monopoly: But Nate-
Nate: One, two, three..
Grey: NATE, I WANNA GO TO BED.
Nate:
Grey:
Nate: Sorry-

(Nate, Beo, Archer, and Penelope are playing UNO Flip)
Beo: *Puts down another plus five* Sorry Archer..
Archer, having 33 cards in her hand: Give me one more plus five I swear I'll rip your head off.
Beo:
Nate:
Penelope:
Nate: I think we should stop playing now..

Nate: I have.. feelings for you.
Grey, flustered: I have feelings.. For you.
Me: The feeling was friendship!

Beo: Babe, look how cute these pens are!
Blu: Beo, thats gay.
Beo:
Beo: Blu, we've been dating-

(Read the first chapter for context)
Lunar: No one's answering? Guess I'll have to call on someone.
Blu: GET DOWN!!
(Everyone starts hiding)
Lunar: You.
Penelope: Shadow? (42)
Lunar: Wrong!
(Idk what to put here)
Blu: SHE GOT PENNY!

(Blu is trying to scared Grey)
Blu: RAH!
Grey: AH! Stop, I could've dropped my crossiant. >:(
Blu: *Laughing*

Blu: We all die you either k1ll urself or get k1lled.
Archer: *Making a beat*
Blu: Whatchu gon do? X2

------
AND... done!
Let me know if yall want more but by that time I'll probably have my phone taken again :')
I might do more when I get the chance lol
Anywho I hope yall liked these silly little scenes, byeee!!
(1346 words including this)
Edit: Now 1376 words