Red White and Black

Chapter Twenty Nine

Sammy

There's a special bond between a father and daughter. And the pain he felt when she was taken, the anguish and heartache that ground at him every day--it was unbearable. No father should ever have to bury his daughter, his precious baby girl.

A light in his life had vanished.

Abbie had represented the one good thing his life had produced. She was the sum total of his positive contribution to the world. And with her death, his life was senseless and futile. After all this, Sammy realized life had to mean something, there had to be a point to it all. Abbie had been it. She had given meaning and purpose, she was the good that made everything he had lived through and experienced worthwhile.

He was alone. Now, more than ever. Alone with his bitterness and pain. Alone with his emptiness and sorrow. He felt he was drifting through each day, just going through the motions but numb to it all. He was dead inside.

There was a knock at the door but before he could respond, in walked Sadie Andrews. He knew her name these days. She even had a key to the house. She showed up at his door every day at this time, knocking and letting herself in. His mother needed care, she needed extra money, and he had a big fat settlement from the mill. If truth be told, Sammy was sure she would have helped with the same diligence and concern even if there had not been a single dime involved.

Funny how his perspective had changed. Funny how he saw things in a new light. Funny how what once seemed so important now seemed trivial and petty. He wished he could share with Abbie. He would love to hear her say I told you so, Daddy! He would love to see her smile, the one that could make his heart melt. Thinking about her reignited the pain and the loneliness, together too much to bear.

"Afternoon, Mr. Morris." Sadie's voice sounded tired but upbeat and cheerful as always. "How is Miss Estelle doin' today?"

Sammy ventured a smile, albeit a weak one. "I thought we decided you were going to call me by my first name. In fact, I'm pretty sure of it." He gestured toward his mother's bedroom. "I think she's sleeping."

"Well, maybe I best come back a bit later," Sadie replied. "I hate to miss a day talking with her and all. I believe she's doin' better every week and I surely don't want to give up now."

It was one month after the funeral before his mother had recuperated enough to come home. It was two months before the steel mill came through with an acceptable settlement offer to compensate him for his injuries and lost time. It was three months when the insurance company paid on Abbie's life insurance policy.

Strange, that one. He had almost forgotten buying the policy for Abbie when she was just a baby, no more than a few weeks old. He had thought at the time it would be a good safety net for her as an adult. A few dollars per week was deducted from his paycheck and he had put the whole thing out of his mind.

Ten thousand dollars. Is that what a life was worth these days? Is that what Abbie's life was worth? Is that the going price on the most precious thing in the world?

He didn't want the money. The very notion of spending it threatened to squeeze what life remained from him. Ten thousand dollars would buy a lot of beer but the thought of turning to alcohol cheapened her existence. He could buy a new house and finally move out of Gary but the idea of starting over seemed to be like trying to erase her memory. In fact spending it on anything--stuff--seemed like it would do nothing other than trivialize her life. He deserved, no--she deserved--something better.

He needed to put some thought to that. Yeah, Abbie deserves something more.

"Sadie? Before you go, how about a cup of coffee?" The words were out of his mouth before he realized he had spoken.

She paused at the door with her hand on the knob. A moment passed and she slipped off her coat. "Of course. Not a problem. Just tell me how you take it."

He realized she misinterpreted his question. "Sadie, I wasn't asking you to serve me a cup of coffee."

He smiled to himself as she furrowed her brows in a moment of confusion.

"I was asking if you'd like to have a cup of coffee with me. As my friend."

He would never forget the look of wonder on her face.

And you know what? It feels good.

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VOTE,  Thank you!