even if he falls :: lashton

ten

ten

ashton ignored luke on monday.

it was in the hallway, and ashton looked directly into luke's eyes. luke smiled small at him, but ashton all but rolled his eyes. his jaw locked and he looked away, staring straight forward. it caught luke off guard. he wanted to text ashton or something, asking what was wrong. though he couldn't find the courage to do so.

it took luke two classes and enough thinking to give him a heart attack if half of it wasn't about finding the square root of x and then dividing it by five. it took all that to finally text ashton.

to ashton
hi :)

he didn't reply until after lunch and while luke was in a class in which phones were forbidden, so he opened the message and replied in his next class, and that's where it started.

ashton
hey

to ashton
what's up?

ashton
precalculus

to ashton
sounds fun......

ashton
do you need something luke

luke felt his chest cave a tad at the blatant response, almost asking him to leave him alone if he didn't need anything. he felt pathetic. of course, he was the measly little fourteen year old begging for attention from the older boy.

to ashton
oh, no.... just wanted to talk to you and see if you were okay. you looked upset in the hallway D:

ashton
i'm fine. i have a question

ashton
did you have fun hanging out with the asshole who fucking picked on you for being gay

luke cringed at the way ashton swore when he spoke about michael. it also made luke's heart sink to his chest. he raised his hand, asking to go to the bathroom. his teacher gave him a disapproving look considering all he'd done was two questions and texted half the time he was there. she let him go anyways.

he walked in and locked himself in a stall, trying to calm his breathing.

to ashton
can you come to the second floor bathroom please?

ashton
not this time luke

so now luke was panicking alone, because ashton was mad at him and he didn't like feeling like he's done something wrong. he tried to call ashton but he was sent to voicemail and he broke down. he didn't know why but suddenly he was very angry, and he needed to get back at ashton for being like he was. an idea formed in his mind. his fingers shook as he sent the message and it was like emotion overtook him when he sent it because it was unlike anything he'd ever say.

to ashton
to answer your question, i did have fun. and unlike you he's not afraid to kiss me....

he didn't know why he said it. him and michael didn't even kiss. michael didn't even walk him to his door like ashton always did.

closing the toilet seat with two fingers, he plopped down and held his head in his hands. a headache started to claw at luke's skull as he tried to clear his mind. why did these things always have to happen to him? not even the fact that ashton was mad at him for god knows what, it was that he had to react the way he was reacting. he didn't mean to cry over the wind blowing, he just did.

now here he was, sitting on a smelly toilet in the boys bathroom, letting out choked sobs every now and again. luke started to feel pressure build in his head until it hurt.