Save the girl ... Save Tom Riddle

Chapter 18

Days of darkness make me smile
No one's safe here for a while
Say you're happy, yeah for real
Come to my side
Got time to kill

________

Horcrux.
That was the word that Susan detected from Tom's mind and that alarmed her.
He had to close the Chamber of Secrets, so he had to fill his mind wih his old obsessions. There was no mention about the attacks and the dead at Hogwarts on the newspaper. Dippet was good at burying scandal.
They had been for days in London. Tom went back to the place he despised the most, the orphanage, for a last dry goodbye and so the muggles could tell he had been there.
Then they took a muggle train, leading to north.
She was excited to travel alone with him, far from the school's routine, far from magic. They could have spent a lot of tike just for themselves, but soon she noticed he had too much else into his mind.
Tom didn't decide yet how to create his horcrux, he was just sure that he would have taken the first good occasion.
Susan imagined he could choose randomly a muggle on that same train and strangle him just for that. It was an awful plan, but she knew he was so blinded by his ambitions he was able to do that.
"I saw the dementor's kiss once" she whispered shivering at the memory "I saw the soul leaving the body. I don't think I want to see it happening to you".
He frowned in disagreement "You prefer seeing me dead, once and forever?".
"Don't tell that" she begged tiredly.
It was something on which they weren't able to agree.
Tom craved limitlessness, Susan preferred being careful.

She felt she needed to fight before he did something irreparable. His mistake with Myrtle Warren was incomparable to the decision of willingly killing someone.
"I believed you could understand me, but now I'm no more sure" Tom walked nervously in the room they rented in Great Hangleton "Why can't you understand that avoiding death is my priority? You noticed too that it's even in my name. Nomen omen. Voldemort. Fly from death".
She sent him a sideways glance from the bed she was sitting on "A name that you created".
He shrugged "I shared my plans with you so you can make it too. You can create a horcrux with me".
"I won't willingly choose that. I know our age is cool, being young and beautiful. But I don't care".
"You should instead. Now we always need to be careful, but with an horcrux we'll be unstoppable" he sat next to her, staring with a wild emotion "There won't be nothing to care about except our targets. No one and nothing can't stop us anymore. We cannot die".
She stared back. She felt he could try to manipulate her too as easily as he was used to do with his followers. He was so good at achieving whatever he wanted. But he wanted to be immortal more than having someone on his same level.
His hand slid on her leg, but she took it away, blocking it on the bed "You won't persuade me nor by teasing my lust nor by torturing me".
He smirked "I can make a mix of them".
"I'm not joking!" She  snapped "And I do understand you. It's you who can't understand".
Tom winced, bit she came closer saying softly  "We were victims of other people's big mistakes. But now you own your life. You own your soul. The choice is entirely yours. And you can't go back from certain choices, that can change everything".
"I promise you I won't change. I will still be me, just a bit more powerful".
She tilted her head "You'll have your soul broken and you'll have murdered a person. How can that not change anything?  If someone would know that, you'll be locked into Akzaban forever".
"But nobody will know, unless you betray me. It will be alright, I planned everything, I will be scrupulous. And I need your help".
She disagreed "I don't want you to ruin your soul. There can be other ways to escape death".
"You know there is not something more efficient than that. I'm sorry of I'm so stubborn, but I don't deserve death, do I?".
She rolled her eyes "You're just sixteen".
"But you're the only one who knows as well as me how much I've been close to death this year. Not to count the times you faced death".
"Still I don't want to kill to preserve myself. You know how big is this step you want to take. There's no way back to restor your soul. Except you feel the deepest remorse, that can even kill you. The price is so big. You'll sacrifice everything".
He looked down murmuring "It's a right price".
Susan stared at him grievous "So you're so sure that's what you want?".
"Yes" he replied with no hesitance "Just I'm not sure when I'll do that yet".
"Didn't we come here to look for your relatives?" She sighed trying to shift to a less hurting topic.
"True. We'll focus on that first. Tomorrow we'll look for the Gaunts' house in Little Hangleton".
"Are you excited?".
He frowned "Not much. Just because I might meet my relatives, it doesn't mean I have to care about them, when they didn't care about me for all my life".
"You don't need them".
He smirked "Exactly".