Somebody That I Used To Know

➸ 6. Heartattack

Chapter Song:

Halsey - Empty Gold

I wasn't supposed to update again so soon, but here you go ;)

Jade's POV

"Sonofa- ahhhh!" I screamed out, gripping my hair at the roots as I sat in my car in the parking lot of school, with tears streaming down my face, mascara flowing like a river.

All this time and all the pain I've gone through, and I saw him with my own eyes, but so much has changed.

Looking in his eyes was like seeing into a crystal ball, visions of the two of us lay just behind the surface of those bluish-green eyes of his. Only, the hardness in them was palpable.

It killed me to see him look at me that way, with so much hatred, united with astonishment from the way I looked now. He almost didn't recognize me, I could see it. But when he realized it really was me, he hated me.

He didn't want to see me. He still didn't understand how I felt and what I went through without him.

I let out another scream as my chest racked with sobs. I felt destroyed inside. I just wanted to chase him down and hold onto his leg, make him talk to me. But, I doubt that would go over so well and I would look like a complete idiot while doing it.

That is the kind of person I used to be. Now, I have to think about what people will think since I'm not 'just Jade' anymore. I'm an A-lister.

Dr. Miller was the one person I needed to talk to right now. I needed her.

A few days ago, I was desperate to leave her office with my meds and today I'm ready to spill my bleeding soul out to her.

I managed to get to her clinic in a flury, speeding past all the blurry cars as I bawled, fat tears running down my face. It hurt inside. It hurt so bad, I felt like I was going to puke from the nausea.

I fumbled out of my car the moment I swerved into a parking spot, dragging my purse on the ground as I trudged toward the entrance, my surroundings blurred by the copious amounts of tears in my eyes.

I couldn't stop the ragged cries that left my mouth, I didn't care who saw me right now. I was being tortured on the inside.

The waiting-room to her office was bare - not a soul to be seen. Fresh tears still falling, I approached the receptionist's desk, sniveling and hyperventilating as I waited for her to notice me - which she did almost immediately.

Jane looked up at me and her eyes widened as she ate her salad, lettuce falling out of her mouth. She choked, wiping her face as she jumped up from her desk, her eyes never leaving my desperate gaze.

"Jade! Is everything okay?" She worriedly looked me over.

It was a rare day that Jade Carter, the vault of the fuckiing year, came to the office in tears, ready to spill her guts. I was usually stone-cold when I came here.

I shook my head as my face was scrunched in what I was sure to be an ugly-crying-face. I don't do pretty-crying.

"I - I need to s-see Dr. M-miller." I tried to keep from bawling before I got into her office, stuttering on my words as the sobs threatened to break free, my chest burning from the effort.

Without hesitation, she was up out of her chair and disappearing behind the office wall while I collapsed to my knees in the middle of the waiting room, hands shaking, my heart trying to climb out of my throat.