What does "THE FAULT IN OUR STARS" mean to you?

What Shapes Us - Chapter 1

What does "The Fault In Our Stars" mean to you?

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By FireFlyGalaxy

Chapter 1

The descent seems endless. I can't even remember how I fell, actually. This is so strange. I'm not even scared anymore. I've fallen impatient with my impending death. 

Something comes into sight below me. How lovely. A nice corn field. That must mean I fell out of an airplane of some sort. But why was I on an airplane? It doesn't matter now. I squeeze my eyes closed. All that matters is the dooming kernels that are only getting closer. And closer. And closer...

I have a spaz attack in my bed. My legs jolting straight. It was yet another falling dream. How nice. I roll over to look at my clock. 3:47 am. It's okay I didn't want to sleep anyway. I get up slowly, my body aching for sleep. My cat Gilly lazily looks up at me when I lift the covers off of her. "At least one of us can sleep," I mumble towards her as I cover her back up. 

I guess I never really sleep, but it's fun acting like I do. I slide on my robe and leopard print slippers, the most hideous but oddly warm things I've ever seen. I slip downstairs to my usual late night destination after quickly looking at myself in the mirror. Of course I look like a zombie, but when do I not? I look through the fridge. Nothing. I look through the pantry. Nothing. Something compels me to repeat a few times, hoping the food fairies have come while I wasn't looking. 

After a hopeless search, I grab my laptop and head back upstairs. Maybe a movie will lull me to sleep. How about a fast-paced action-romance with lots of shooting and fight scenes? I'm a hopeless cause.  I start the movie and grab my phone. I text Gunnar, who is awake most nights, like me.   Oddly, he didn't text back. Maybe it's the day of the week where he at least attempts to sleep, but he probably got his phone taken again. For the umpteenth time. That kid needs to try harder in school, but who could blame him for slacking after the 'incident'. 

I glance over at my alarm clock. 4:06 am. I have to get up in two hours. I lay back, turning off the neglected Mr. and Mrs. Smith and closing my laptop. I close my eyes and begin to drift off when I receive a text. 

 "Can I come over?"

 I knew he was awake. 

I walked downstairs and opened the front door. Mom wasn't home tonight, so I was free to have a wild party for all she cared, but being the person I am, I chose this time to walk around without pants.

As I already knew, Gunnar was leaned up against the door frame as I opened it.   "Hey, Timber," he said with a smirk. He waltzes in, flipping his dark brown hair. I give him a friendly punch in the arm, and we head upstairs. 

"So, what's up?" I ask as we each take a seat on opposite sides of the bed. As I gingerly pick up the half asleep Gilly, Gunnar looks down. "I just couldn't sleep and I wanted to talk to my best friend." He smiles a little, a gesture few see from him anymore. 

"Makes sense," I pronounce. "We always say texting is impersonal, so why would it be personal at four in the morning on a school night?" I say, trying to be funny. 

 "Don't even talk of that place," he whispers, as the smile on his face fades. 

I try to change the subject before he gets sad again. "Wanna watch a movie?" I motion towards my extensive movie collection.  He tumbles off of the bed in an ungraceful manner, and lands directly in front of them. He picks out Batman: The Dark Knight Rises. We watch this movie almost every time he comes over, because we are both Batman fanatics. 

I poke it in to the cd drive, and we settle up against the headboard. 

We both drift asleep, only waking to the sound of my alarm clock.   "Can we skip today? We can go on an adventure." Gunnar whispers groggily. 

"Some of us care about our future," I say with a smirk as I start braiding my hair back so I can get ready. He frowns and we go downstairs to make some breakfast. 

It's quiet for a while, Gunnar focusing on the cooking while I do my makeup.   I start thinking, Isn't today an easy day? I don't have any known tests, and I haven't missed a day of school this year. Maybe an adventure is what we both need. 

I walk in to the kitchen and Gunnar is slaving away at the stove. I walk upstairs hastily and get my special let's-go-on-an-adventure backpack that already has a stash of money and some water bottles inside.   I march into the kitchen valiantly to get Gunnar's attention. He looks utterly confused. "Are you really going to miss a precious day of school?" he mockingly says, noticing my Hobbit backpack. 

I stare him straight in the eye as we both grin. "Let's go on an adventure."