Fire and Ice

amanda

     "—What?" I snap my head towards Sarah and Rebecca who suddenly appeared at out nowhere at the water fountain. "I'm in the middle of doing something important."

"Well important can wait silly!" Rebecca giggles tugging at my braid.

I look past them towards the girl I really want to talk to, but she has already disappeared.

Great, just great.

My eyes land on them. "Fine, what is it?"

"Are you okay?" Sarah asks with concern. "Do you need some coffee to perk you up?"

Completely frustrated I shout, "Coffee doesn't solve all the worlds problems you know!"

Both girls' eyes widen in utter shock, and Sarah's mouth hangs open. I frown instantly regretting yelling at them; why am I so irritable all of the sudden?

"Wow, sor-ay. What's up with you? You're not acting like your usual self."

I sigh heavily. "I know, you're right, I'm sorry I yelled at you. I just need some time alone, can we talk later?"

Again they say in sync, "Sure."

I squeeze both of their shoulders before speed walking toward the exit: I have to go after Jane. I hear Sarah yelling something about texting me later, but I'm already halfway out the doorway. I searched the different quads and and still no used, I then realized she must be in the library but the bell had already rang. I walk back to class completely defeated.

I need to find Jane.

— — —

My mom comes into my room later that night and the first thing I blurt out before she can get to my bed is: "How can I talk to Jane?"

"You didn't talk to her?"

"If I did, would I be asking you?" I stretched the words out to show my irritation.

There was a moment of silence and I mentally slapped myself. My attitude is getting out of hand. I sigh, feeling that I'm going to run out of air soon if I keep at it.

"Sorry mom," my voice coming out softer and quieter than I wanted too.

She sits beside me on my bed and wraps her arm around me the kisses the top of my head accepting my apology. " I know it's difficult losing a best friend; even more, when you can't get them back."

"Mom," I feel tears tempting to leak from my eyes and I could feel the lump forming in the bottom of my throat, "what do I do? I want to be friends with Jane again, but it seems so hard to talk to her now!"

"Well, make it easy then," she says it like it really is easy.

"How?" I whine.

"Really honey?" She laughs lightly as if it wasn't already obvious. I wanted to scoot away from her in embarrassment, but her grip was strong. "You are one of the most well- rounded girls in school, and you don't know how to easily talk to people?"

"Jane is different mom," I inform her.

"I know, I know," she moves a piece of my blonde hair behind my ear and lightly presses her face into my hair speaking softly. "Just relax, it will help."

"You think so?" My voice is barely above a whisper.

"I know so. You already know what to say, now just do it."

The confidence in her tone travels through my veins and I absorb as much as I can of it, but I don't know it it will be enough.

"I try, but Sarah and Rebecca always intervene somehow or I can easily lose her in a crowd. It's like the universe doesn't want us to be friends anymore."

Pain jabbed into my heart making my chest hurt; I really didn't want to think like that.

"Don't say that Amanda. You need to try harder and stop making excuses."

"How?" I ask again.

"You will know," she points to my heart, "deep inside your here. If you really, truly want to be friends with Jane, then you will."

The only thing I could do is nod, because my mom is a hindered and one perfect right. She kisses the top of my head goodnight and a can finally form a small smile gently kissing her cheek.

What would I do with my mom?

My mom turns around at the doorway and adds, "there is no perfect time, you have to make of the imperfect time."

I blow her a kiss goodbye and she catches it with a smile, then closes the door once again leaving me to think about Jane.