Souma Uchiha

Chapter 1-Reborn as the son of background characters

Sitting still for a thousand years isn't an incredibly difficult thing to do when you've died. It's actually quite easy to fall into a short repeated rut that can't be pulled out of. In my case, as soon as I died I just settled down with my ghostly legs and relived my life in my mind a couple dozen times till I was satisfied with everything I ever did and could have done.

"Well I suppose that's enough fucking self-pity for me" I muttered as I stood up from the ground and opened my eyes. "Ah, blackness...I wasn't too sure what to expect from the afterlife but I didn't expect this" I wandered about the darkness as memories flashed about all around me. "Am I in my own mind?" I looked at a particular memory where I had been reading manga and felt a smile crawl onto my face. "Well... I've heard that anything can happen after death and I certainly don't want to be reincarnated in that shit hole again."

I approached the memory and snatched the book from the hands of my younger self. She didn't even flinch. I flipped through the pages and tossed it back before looking for a different manga, one in particular that really had me entranced. "Ah, there you are" I murmured softly as another memory popped up with a younger me reading the first issue of Naruto with excitement. "I'll take that"

I took it and brought to my breasts in a loving cradle before grinning madly. "Now, all I have to do is believe it exists then.." The world around me was suddenly brought to life with colors. My eyes widened in excitement as I felt myself being pulled. All the anime and manga in the world couldn't prepare me for the utter magnificence that is Konoha. I looked around at people bustling about the streets and was promptly reminded of the game I played as a child called broken bonds. It was so, large!

"I wonder why I'm moving" I hummed as my translucent body floated in a certain direction without my command. I looked in the direction I was going and tilted my head. "The hospital is it? Am I to be reincarnated then?"

Suddenly I was being tugged in an uncomfortable way and squeezed into something small. I felt my body being ripped to shreds as my mind blanked. "Waah?" I screeched before I was suddenly inside what felt like a squishy, hot fruit of some sort. I blinked at the sudden feeling my body gave and nearly sighed.

I wasn't breathing, I wasn't capable of moving much, and the color around me was somewhat reddish. Like looking at your fingers with a flashlight behind them. I could also tell that I was upside down by the feel of gravity pulling at my body. I kicked around and frowned at how soft everything was. I could feel something squishy in between my toes. I moved my hands and suddenly felt my body move downwards. It was abrupt and scared the shit out of me. Literally.

I heard the sounds of screaming and nearly rolled my eyes. Now I know child birth wasn't that bad, someone better calm her the fuck down. When I had my child I didn't even need any of that pain killer shit, not that it was available but I still didn't need it. I was a champion of childbirth, not a peep out of me. Sure it hurt like hell but I didn't yell about it like some mothers liked to do. I kicked upwards and twirled in the womb a little so I would be in a better position and felt the top of my head grow cold. Good, now were getting somewhere.

I kicked again and found myself falling into the arms of some giant mother fucker. I breathed in the air with a grin on my face. Fucking damn it felt good to be alive!

~

I will absolutely not mention the boring baby shit I went through to finally get to the point where I was old enough to get into the damn academy. If that wasn't clear enough, I am now old enough to be in the academy. I am 8 years old and anything that has happened before this point is incredibly boring and not worth mentioning at all. "First I had learn a whole new fucking language..fucking drink tits..diapers..fuck" I grumbled as I walked with my hands in the sleeves of my haori.