Kill Me With Words (All Time Low Fanfiction)

Chapter 31

The parking lot where I sat was suddenly flooded by the light of the bus’s kitchen.

I watched Jack’s shadow on the gravel as he moved around, his lanky figure reaching up into high presses above the sofa. Then he disappeared.

Jack dropped a blanket around my shoulders when he stepped out of the bus.

“Do you have it?”

He sat down beside me and nodded.

I looked at him. He looked exhausted, which he must have been, having been hauled out of bed in the middle of the night. His face was pale, his eyes were bloodshot, with dark bags hanging beneath them.

And in his hands; a crumpled envelope.

 

I stared at it for a second. It was hard to believe hat everything was in there. Jacob’s last words, and the words that Simon had threatened me for. The words that could save me from whatever he had in store for me.

It scared me actually. Knowing that the answers to all of my questions were sitting a foot away from me.

 

I looked away. I looked at the sky instead, taking in the millions and millions of stars that twinkled above me, dancing on top of the navy blue sky.

“You know...” I said, my voice seeming loud when introduced to the silence all around us, “The stars are different here. Different than they were in Summerfield.”

“I used to learn off the constellations so that I could be romantic on dates,” Jack said with a laugh, “I can barely remember any of them now.” He stared up at the sky. “I think that’s the Plough.”

Silence.

“Do you want to read it now?” Jack asked me gently.

I hesitated. “Okay.”

He passed it to me. I unfolded the envelope, listening eagerly to the crinkling sounds of the paper.

And then it was there - Jacob’s last words on pen and paper, waiting for me.

 

Finley,

There are a lot of things that you know about. Things that you shouldn’t know about, like the pain of losing parents, or what it feels like to see your brother being arrested in front of you. And now, I’ve given you another nugget of knowledge to add to that collection. What it’s like to lose a brother.

I’m really sorry, Finley. I want you to know that, I’m really fucking sorry and I wish I didn’t have to put you through this kind of pain, especially since I’ve seen firsthand what pain like this does to you. What’s even worse is that this time I won’t be fine to comfort you.

Don’t worry about me, though. Promise me you won’t worry about me, because this is the one time that you don’t have to worry about me. After I’m dead, everything will just go away - the gangs and the drugs and the debts. And for once, I’ll be fine.

So will you. You have Alex now, and I’m so glad that you have someone to look after you, someone who’s not reckless like me. Alex will keep you safe. I’ve tested him already, back when you tried to jump off a bridge. And yeah, I know about that. I’m your brother, I knew if I said the right things you’d end up there. I was the one who called Alex and told him to go, I stole his number from your pocket.

Promise me something, Finley, promise me you’ll never let anyone make you feel like that again. You’re too important for this world to lose you.