PAIN | Jasper Hale [1]

~CHAPTER 1: ARRIVAL~

(edited: 14.08.2022)

EMPTY that's how I felt for the last three years. Not even Charlie's awkward but kind support could help me, or the logical words of my psychiatrist. I just carried my pain everywhere and with time it became a part of me.

I mostly kept on lying to everyone, specialist or not. I always stated that I'm fine and with time they started to believe me. Hell. After a while I even started to believe that I'm fine.

But then the night came and with it, my nightmares.

The nightmares were always the same, I relived the whole day of the fire, up until I passed out on the roof, staring at my father's body. Then I would wake up, breathing heavily as I still remembered the choking panic from that night.

After I calmed down a bit, I would go check the house for any danger. Make sure the windows are closed, the doors locked and the stove turned off.

Charlie quickly got used to the sound of me walking around the house checking every corner.

Once my little check up is done, I return to my room. Which is thankfully downstairs where Charlie previously had his office, it's located right by the backdoor so I'm calmer knowing that if anything happens, I can get out fairly quickly. When I'm back in my room, I'm not even trying to fall back asleep, I just clean or read until morning.

Which brings me right here, to my small bedroom at five in the morning where I'm reorganizing my closet, that is until I felt the smell of smoke. I'm on my feet in a flash, I can feel my body trembling as I run out of my room calling out.

"Charlie?!"

I'm almost in the kitchen, when he finally answers "It's fine! Sorry– shit!"

When I entered the kitchen, I watched as Charlie cursed under his breath, quickly opening some windows to get rid of the smell of smoke. I leaned against the wall, hand on my chest as I calmed myself down.

"Are you alright?" Charlie asked, looking worried.

"Fine." I responded, moving to sit at the table.

Charlie shook his head and moved to sit next to me "No, no you're not. I don't think that you should go back to school yet. Let's talk about it again with your doctor, at least to make sure that you're going to be okay."

To be honest I wanted to agree with him and just continue my online classes, away from people like I did for the last three years. But I had to show Charlie that I'm really fine, so that he could stop focusing on me. Instead he should start thinking more about his daughter, who will start living with him, with us. She should be the one in the center of his attention.

I gave him a well practiced smile, before saying "I'm good, really Charlie. I just got scared, that's all." I could see in his eyes that I didn't convince him yet, so I got up and put my hand on his shoulder adding "Besides, Isabella will be happy that she won't be the only one joining school this late into the semester."