accompanied | billie eilish

twenty-five

billie

17 days until the lawsuit

i barely have time to be upset about the fact that aria doesn't remember fucking kissing me before everything blows up in the bus regarding the lawsuit.

everyone's concerned. naturally; if sam lands himself a good lawyer who can win the case then despite the vision having done nothing wrong, this could severely impact their success as a band for the rest of their future, which as a result could impact the futures of the entire team of this tour.

"hey, you okay dude?" i ask, catching tyler's arm as he swings around to walk away.

he shrugs. "this doesn't feel real. i don't want it to be real," he mutters, and then walks away towards his bunk. i watch him leave, unsure what to do.

i feel arms wrap around me, and turn to see aria with her face buried in the crook of my neck. i can feel tears slowly tracing their way from her skin to mine, and i sigh, looking around the bus.

everyone is in disarray. the stylists stand in one corner, the security team in another and the tech team not far away from them, everyone unnaturally somber; the bus hasn't had this energy before. not ever; not even when sam actually left.

"you okay?" i murmur, wrapping my arms back around aria. she sighs and takes a moment before we break apart.

"everything feels really wrong," she mumbles. "well. i know everything is wrong. but it feels like nothing is right anymore."
she pauses, frowning. "imean- deja vu."

"come on," i say quietly, and we leave the bus as we make our way to the canopy area outside. it's dusk now; the last few golden rays of sun are gently disappearing behind the buildings in front of us. i sit down on the ground, and aria follows.

it astonishes me how quickly i've grown so genuinely close to aria in the months we've been touring. not just her, but quite literally everyone on this tour. there's not a single person living on this bus who i dislike or don't get along with. i wouldn't mind if this tour went on forever.

"how's everything with your family?" i ask after a moment, which seems to surprise aria. she doesn't speak of them much, but from what she and others have said and what i can infer, she definitely doesn't share in the secure family i've ended up with.

she shrugs. "okay. not heard from them in a while."

"how many siblings do you have again?"

her face closes off completely.
"four. technically three."

i wrinkle my nose in confusion, and she sighs, looking extremely conflicted. there's a few moments of silence before she says something i wasn't expecting at all.

"one of my sisters passed away a few years ago."

"oh shit, i'm sorry," i breathe. by technically i'd been expecting a begrudging stepsibling or something.

"she was my best friend," aria murmurs. "and when she was gone it was so sudden. and sam was a brother to me, and now he's gone so sudden too. i don't know." she runs a hand through her hair and sighs. "deja vu. everything's connected and all that shit."

"do you really believe that?" i ask, cocking my head to one side as her dark gaze meets mine.

"if you're looking through the right lenses,

then everything is connected."