Unnatural Instinct: Fallen

22.

Despite my tight hold, you manage to wriggle out of my grip as you begin thrashing madly against me. You beat at my chest. You tear feathers out of my wings. A shrill scream makes my ears ring. Realising you're awake, I let you go.

I glimpse your face, white and sweaty, as you leap out of bed and rush to the window. For a dreadful moment I think you're going to throw yourself out of it, but you only vomit. Again and again, you bring up the contents of your stomach. I can only imagine what he's done to you to make you react this way.

When you're finished, you stand there for several moments, hunched through the window, your hair falling around your face as you take deep, ragged breaths. Then you wipe your mouth and turn to me. You can't look at me, gazing at your feet.

I go to approach but you stop me with a shout. 'No! Leave me alone!' You grip at yourself as you shudder.

I back away as you slowly approach the bed. You're staggering, appearing even more exhausted than when you first fell asleep. My master's mind games can do that. Particularly the bad ones. Going by the way your eyes have sunken in your face, I can only guess the depths of his cruelty.

Unsteadily, you crawl into bed. You search amid the sheets, and I wonder what you're looking for, until you find your shorts and hastily yank them back on. You fall back into the pillow, gazing wide-eyed at the ceiling. You're so pale your lips are blue—and it's not just from trauma or fear. The night is icy. You cannot stay like this. I can see goose bumps trailing up your arms and legs.

I move towards you.

'No,' you thrust your hand out, 'I told you to keep away. I don't-I don't want you.'

I can hear the tears in your voice. 'You're cold.'

'No!' You push against me as I join you in bed.

'I'm not your enemy,' I say.

You thrash and scream but when I grab your arms you grab them back desperately. Your tears come in a flood. Your lips are so thin they disappear into your face. 'It was horrible.'

Gently, I pull you against me, both to warm you up and in an attempt to comfort you. You shudder in my arms as I rub my hands up and down your back.

'I can't go to sleep—never again. I can't go to sleep—never again.' You repeat the same thing over and over. Your arms are around my neck now as you press your head into my chest. You're trembling so hard your teeth chatter. But the warmth of my wings soon begins to take affect and the trembling eases; your incessant murmuring softens.

Soon you lie still in my arms. Your breathing turns long and deep and I can only pray to God that my master leaves you alone for the rest of the night.

Either God listens or my master has had his fill for the time being; you sleep without disruption until the sun rises.

I don't ask you what happened as you rest on the bed quietly, staring up at the ceiling with your hands on your chest. Youreyes are more sunken in than ever and there are dark shadows under them,despite your unbroken rest.

'We cannot linger,' I say.

You turn towards me, unblinking. For a moment, I think you're going to give up and roll away, but you sit up and drop your feet to the floor.

I can't help but admire your strength.

We steal some breakfast from a nearby village before beginning another day's long journey. You do your best to keep yourself light in my arms and I'm thankful for that; it means I can fly greater distances with fewer breaks.

We cross lands and oceans and cities. The blasting icy wind begins to thaw into something that's warm and thick. We're nowhere near Iceland anymore but flying over the vast continent of America.