redamancy (a sequel) // c.b

viii. secrets in the dark

harlow believed that keeping secrets wasn't always a bad thing to do. sometimes, keeping secrets was the only thing that people could do to protect the ones they love. and that was harlow's intention when it came to her colby secret.

at least initially.

for a few days after colby and harlow spoke, she still believed it was the right decision to keep it a secret in order to protect carter. harlow strongly believed that carter would be upset with the information. though she didn't necessarily think he'd be upset with her for keeping it a secret or even for talking to colby in the first place.

harlow was almost positive that he'd be upset with himself. they'd never outright discussed it, but harlow was pretty sure he was afraid of losing her to colby. carter knew all about their relationship, and he knew how colby had tried to win harlow back after she had started seeing him. he knew then how much colby loved her, and if he were to find out that he still felt the same way about her a year later, he'd be absolutely crushed. he'd be upset because there would be nothing he could do.

there were, obviously, things that carter could do to intimidate colby if he wanted to do so, but he wasn't the type of guy to do that. he was kind, loyal, and extremely gentle.

so harlow had a pretty good feeling that spilling the secret would ultimately hurt carter, or at the very least, it would wound his armor. but the secret was weighing heavily on harlow's chest, especially after colby's confirmation of still wanting to be in her life in whatever way he could be. she felt guilty for even listening to him in the first place. she felt disloyal to the one person who has always been loyal to her.

so although harlow believed that sometimes keeping a secret was the right thing to do, she also believed that it wasn't right for her to keep this secret from carter.

she waited until they were getting ready for bed to tell him because after living with him for months, she knew that he was at his softest when he was tired.

"carter?" harlow called out from their ensuite, opening a drawer to grab a makeup wipe.

there was a beat of silence before carter entered the bathroom, wearing nothing but a pair of shorts, making a noise to let harlow know he heard her.

she managed to pull herself up on the vanity, sitting next to the sink while facing carter. "i need to tell you a secret," she said quietly, watching as he readied his toothbrush.

carter smirked, "did you eat all the popsicles again? because that happens like once a week, it's not a secret at this point, babe. i know it's you."

"once a week is a bit dramatic, don't ya think?"

carter laughed at her words, then grabbed his toothbrush from the stand to start getting ready for bed. "even if it's every two weeks, it's still like twenty-five popsicles."

harlow pouted, "it's just flavored ice. how bad can it be for you?"

"and lots of sugar too," carter replied with a raised eyebrow.

"well that explains why i'm such a treat to have around," harlow replied with a wink.

carter rolled his eyes very dramatically, tacking on a groan for effect. "that was terrible, h. not punny at all."

harlow continued to remove her makeup from where she was sitting, watching her boyfriend as he brushed his teeth. their night routines only lined up a few days a week, with carter taking the occasional night shift and harlow's night classes that sometimes led into later-night study sessions. she loved being with him all the time, but there was something special about getting ready for bed together. it was so simple but filled her with so much love at the same time.