Hold Me While You Wait

21|where you once were

where you once were

The water could not cool down Elis enough, especially when she's just been out gardening under the hot sun and in the humid air. The little town was the hottest in the times of summer and the coldest in winter, which was weird. But Elis missed living in the lake house full time, because the water was always there for whenever she felt like a swim.

It wasn't like in the city, where her new home that she has momentarily left for the summer was, because in the little town, it was carefree and dispersed, with the kindest of people practicing old-fashioned ways as if they'd been totally isolated from the rest of the world. But Elis loved it because it was simple, uncomplicated, joyous too.

And after spending the past three and most crucial years of her life away, she felt as if the busy city had ruined her, contradictory to how it was supposed to make her, because they wouldn't have moved if they didn't think the change of scenery and circumstances would be good. But the family had thought wrong, because Elis was a little happier in the lake house, despite the horrible memories in which it brought.

But Elis remembered some of the exuberant memories of her time in the lake house, when life served little to no purpose at all rather than to wonder what her next portrait would be, or annoying her brother and playing with his bike.

And at that time in the lake water, Elis had been thinking of Bryson, but unlike most days, only happy memories visited her mind.

She remembered the big smile on his face when their parents surprised him with a second hand motorcycle that Bryson had wanted for years. They had saved up for a long time to finally get it for him, and Elis not only remembered the grateful hugs that he gave to his parents but the long hug he gave to her too, as if it was her that worked hard to make sure that his dreams came true.

The curly haired girl felt content, free of her misery for some time as she stared out into nowhere with a small smile resting on her face. Elis felt someone getting in the water and when she'd turned around, she realized it was her father, who swam continuously close to where Elis was, until he stopped next to her.

"Hey," the older man said to his daughter. "Hey," Elis greeted back curtly.

"I saw the garden. Good job... I see I raised you well."

Elis grinned lopsidedly and playfully rolled her eyes.

"I'm serious," Mr Collins deadpanned. "Gardening is no easy task to man, especially if you're female."

"Dad, it's the twenty first century. Woman can do almost anything that men can do, better even."

"I know that," he smiled. "And I know the effort you're putting into fixing that garden. And I appreciate it Beth."

"Still not Elis?" Elis chuckled, surprised the nickname her dad given her from since she were a toddler still lived to that day, even though nobody but him called her it.

"Err... No. Not quite," Mr Collins matched her daughter's quiet but infectious rumble of laughter. "I could help you some time," her dad added. "With gardening."

"Thanks Dad, but I think I got it. I told Mom I'd do it all alone."

"Oh yeah? Okay that's good, but just don't ever hesitate to call out for help whenever you need it. Your mother has prohibited me from doing anything in the house because of her maniacal 'renovation'," her dad joked, taking his hands out of the water to use air quotes. "It was supposed to be a little upgrade from what the house looked like, but she's contempt on changing everything, including the color of the walls and the pattern of the ceiling. I don't even know why since we're not going to live here full time. Soon enough, in six weeks time, we'll have to go back to our lives in the city."

It was surreal that six weeks had passed since they arrived to the lake house, and Elis had only six more. She didn't like the rush time seemed to possess, as each counting second got her closer and closer to leaving, leaving the town, the house that served as a physical reminder that Bryson once lived, and leaving Gray. She didn't want to leave Gray.

"Dad... Do you think we could come back often?" She asked, looking away from her dad's face as she did.

"I don't know Beth, we definitely will return some day, but not quite soon. You've got college, I've got work and your mother's catering company won't run itself."

Screw college. Everything about it. Elis didn't even want to attend it anyway. She'd rather be here, in the lake house, with Gray. She'd rather be doing anything, anything other than the life she was forced to live after Bryson's death.

"You do understand, right?" The older man asked, and Elis looked at him. The gray hair forming on his beared made him appear quite older than he was. And his brown hair was curly, just like the one Elis and Bryson had inherited.

And Elis slowly nodded, but she didn't quite understand. She never could. All she wanted was her old life back, a want, a desperate need Elis could never have no matter how many times she wished.

"I just... I wish everything was still the same."

Mr Collins exhaled, Elis's words striking an emotion he'd been successful in hiding for such a long time, just so that he could take care of his family and make sure Elis and Mrs Collins were okay. But the man was still human, and therefore not immune to the pain he still felt to losing his son.

"Me too Beth. Me too."

"But we can't have everything right?" The curly haired girl released a curt chuckle, one that was full of self-pity and endless grief it poured out of her to flow along with the currents of the lake.

"Don't... I don't want you to keep living and feeling like this, Beth. I want the best for you at all times."

"I know that Dad... But it's hard to not miss that I once had a twin brother who could've been nineteen today."

Mr Collins sighed, pulling Elis closer to his side as he rested his chin on her head. "I know," he kissed the top of her head. "I know. Happy birthday Beth."