the best surprise was you...

Broken hearts

Viv's hand was trembling as she tried to unlock the door. "Here, let me get that for you." Beth took the keys out of her hand and unlocked the door. Viv stammered a weak thanks and walked inside. As soon as she was in she threw her bag aside and slumped onto the couch with the intention of never moving again. "Here, a blanket." Viv felt a blanket being laid on her and tucked in. "Do you want anything to eat or drink?" Viv slowly shook her head. "That's okay, I'm here if you need anything". Beth walked over to the TV and put a Harry Potter movie on, went back to the couch and sat down. Viv was so grateful that Beth didn't ask anything about Lisa or the breakup. She was just there and her presence was something Viv appreciated very much. She also noticed that Beth didn't look at her with pity in her eyes but with understanding. Which, come to think of it wasn't that odd. She'd had a hard breakup herself not too long ago.
Viv tried to empty her mind. She just wanted to sleep and not think about anything for a while. She looked up at the tv and saw that Dudley had just fallen into the snake tank. Viv smiled weakly. It was always good to watch Harry Potter. Especially the first one. There was something so comforting about it. She watched on, but it didn't take long for Viv to sink into a deep and uneasy sleep.

She was right back in the living room, with Lisa shouting herself hoarse. Viv wanted to shout back, tell her that she wasn't doing this to hurt her, but to save herself. But whenever she tried to open her mouth to do so, no sound came out. She just stood there, a blank expression on her face, hearing Lisa but not really listening. It felt like it went on for hours when all of the sudden she heard a second voice. It was a calm voice like that of an angel. Viv looked around trying to locate the source of the sound. She saw no one but the voice grew steadily louder.

"Wakey wakey" Viv stirred and groaned in her sleep. Beth smiled. She looked so peaceful when she slept. "It's time to wake up Viv" Beth whispered softly. Viv slowly opened her eyes. "Huh, what?" She groaned. "I thought I'd wake you as dinner is nearly ready" Viv gave Beth a questioning look. "Dinner nearly ready?" Beth smiled. "Yeah, I thought I'd cook. That's why I had to pop into Tesco's real quick" Viv sat up a little straighter. "We're eating tacos if that's okay." Viv nodded "yeah of course" she stood up and followed Beth to the table.

They sat in silence as they ate their way through the mount of tacos Beth had made which took a surprisingly short amount of time. After dinner they both just sat, staring off into the distance until...
"Will it ever stop?" Beth looked up in mild surprise. It was one of the first times Viv had spoken since they'd arrived back at her house. "Will what, ever stop?"
"The... uhh... pain..." it took Viv everything not to start crying again. Beth considered Viv for a moment before answering. "I don't think the pain will ever fully go away. It is something that we need to learn to live with. It's like a deep wound. It'll heal, but the scar will always be visible and that's okay. Scars are a part of life I think and the more we accept that the easier life will be." Viv let those words sink in for a moment and took a sip of water. It sounded so wise yet so logical. "Is your wound a scar yet?" Viv blurted out. "Well... like a wound it sometimes bursts open, because you scratch it or for no particular reason at all. It's the same with the pain that I feel. Usually, I'm all right but sometimes I start crying out of the blue without any real reason or I start crying because something reminded me of Daan. So to answer your question, no my wound is not a scar yet. I'm still healing." It fell silent once more as Viv took all of it in. The prospect of always feeling some part of the pain she was feeling now was almost unbearable and yet Beth's words had a comforting effect. They made her feel like she wasn't alone.

later that same evening

"oy sleepyhead" Viv woke up with a start. She'd fallen asleep on the couch, again. Beth giggled "you are a special one you are, you've nearly slept through the whole film" Viv gave a weak smile as she sat up straight again. She must have been sleeping at an odd angle because her neck felt rather sore. She massaged it to loosen up the muscles a bit. "yeah I'd have a sore neck too if I were sleeping like you" She was still giggling and Viv couldn't help but broaden her smile. She couldn't help it, Beth's laugh was very infectious. "How did I sleep," Viv asked as she was stretching out her whole body. "Well you started off with your head tilting backwards and forwards, but I guess your body got tired of that after a while so you laid your head on my shoulder." Viv felt her cheeks redden a bit but she didn't know why. "oh I'm sorry, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable." Beth gave a confused look. "uncomfortable? I never said I was uncomfortable." It fell silent for a minute or so until Beth gave a big jawn. "Are you tired? If you are, don't feel obligated to stay or anything. You can go home..." those last words trailed away as Viv looked up into those bright blue eyes. She gave Beth a short smile and started to fumble with a loose thread on her shirt. "Will you be alright? once I leave I mean because for me, the nights were usually the hardest part to get through." Viv didn't answer immediately. She knew what she wanted to say. She wanted to say that she was going to be okay and that sleeping wouldn't be a problem. However, instead of saying what she wanted she said "no, I don't think I will be alright." Viv was shocked. what was she doing? She would normally never say things like that, but then again this wasn't a situation she would normally be in. She just felt like she had to be honest with Beth because one she really was dreading the night and two, she felt like if she wasn't honest with her, Beth would see right through it.
"Okay, that's settled then I'm sleeping here tonight" Viv was so grateful that she had someone with her that understood her completely. It was like having some sort of guard, a patronus if you will. Beth felt like the only bit of light guiding her in a very dark and long tunnel.