Starship Odyssey | ONC 2021

Chapter Three - Threat Assessment and Other Anachronisms

"Well then. We're off to as bad a start as any first contact event I'm aware of," said Lulu. "Odysseus, I assume you're scanning the ships, yes? How serious should we take this threat."

<Their general field technology isn't equivtech, I can tell you that much. As soon as I brought our shields up their tractor beam snapped like a twig. No carrier field whatsoever, or at least none that was powerful enough to even notice. That's with a preexisting lock, which they no longer have.>

"If they can't maintain a tractor lock through our shields then they won't be able to penetrate them with any conventional weapons."

"Barring, of course, something completely unprecedented," said Dr. Fido, still clutching his monkey

"So they probably can't actually hurt us?" asked Lulu.

<Maybe. I don't know. I'm hardly a military expert.>

"Just for my own personal edification," asked Dr. Birdwhistle, "if we were to come under attack we don't have any weapons we could return fire with do we?"

"Of course not," said Lulu.

"Of course not..." echoed Birdwhistle, rolling his eyes.

"This is an Ambassador-class exploratory vessel. It would be unbecoming for it to be possessed of offensive capabilities, don't you think?" asked Lulu. "Doesn't make the right kind of first impression."

"The Odyssey must at least have a few heavy duty EMFMs, right?" asked Dr. Fido. "That's what they used to fight with during the war."

"Before we spit on our hands, hoist the black flag, and start retrofitting the Odyssey into a pirate ship, let's step back for a moment," said Lulu. "Some newly discovered aliens, in all likelihood so technologically primitive as to be out-of-play, are rattling their sabers at us. Perhaps their literal sabers. That's not really sufficient provocation to start tearing them apart at the molecular level."

"We're just brainstorming," said Dr. Fido. "If it turns out we're wrong and they are capable of harming us we will want to know what our options are."

Lulu tried to remind herself that the members of the Think Tank weren't horrible on purpose.

"Let's focus on a more productive line of inquiry," she said. "Odysseus, do you think we have enough information about how they communicate that we could reply in a form they'll understand?"

<Maybe something simple and unambiguous.>

"Could we manage 'we come in peace'?"

<Probably not. Not in a way that I could be certain wouldn't be misinterpreted. That's not a message one typically wants to risk misfiring.>

"How about 'we don't surrender'?"

<That I could manage.>

"Send it. Maybe once we get their reply we'll have enough to work with to try again with peace."

"In all likelihood this will further incite them," said Dr. Birdwhistle. "I hope everyone is very comfortable with our assessment of their offensive capabilities."

The Odyssey sent out its intended reply, a long, convoluted, and highly redundant stream of data all intended to convey a single basic idea: 'no'.

When all three of the alien ships opened fire it became clear the message had been understood.

The group all watched the electromagnetic fireworks in their minds eye. Each of the ships had a panoply of different weapons, all of them incredibly flashy, none of them capable of so much as causing the slightest tremble in the outermost layer of the Odyssey's concentric defense fields. It almost resembled fireworks being thrown uselessly against a steel barrier, exploding as colorfully as they were ineffective.

<That's pretty much what I expected,> signaled Odysseus, <They're not going to get anywhere with this.>

"Keep sending them contact packages, and whatever else might help them better understand us. I want to open a real dialog with these people. Maybe now that they see their weapons are useless against us they'll be more open to peaceful co-existence."

<Sending now. However I believe we may have a more troubling issue than our souring relationship with these alien primitives. I can hardly believe I'm saying this, but we appear to be lost.>

"What?" asked Lulu.

<It means I don't know where we are. I can detect no hyperbeacons, no cosmic landmarks, no familiar stars. Nothing. I have no idea how to set a course for home because I have no idea in what direction home is.>

"Have you tried a long range survey of the stellar neighborhood?"

<Yes. Nothing.>

"That shouldn't be possible," said Lulu.

"Not if we're in a different galaxy," said Dr. Fido, almost nonchalantly.

There was a long moment of silence, broken by Dr. Eisenstein gloating.

"I told you seventh dimension hyperspace travel would be revolutionary."