Sikander, Don't Die

chapter fifteen: falling out

By now, Roshanak knew the Kandake Odile to be a person resembling exactly a coconut. With an exterior too rough and hard to break, she was a bowl of sweet water within. Luckily, the arrival of the child in her womb coaxed Odile to be softer towards Roshanak.

Roshanak rubbed her belly and smiled. She wasn't looking full yet. It was maybe a month, and she was exceptionally careful about her diet and chores. As a queen she rarely had to exert bodily force, but at present she was reluctant to even pull the heavy lid of a trunk. What if she ended up hurting the child? She didn't want to lose her baby. And on top of that, it was the baby of the Shah. The first child of Persia in this new dawn.

People would berate her if she did something stupid. Odile scrutinised each and everything she ate, even the fruits sent by Hridayank went through inspection. Odile would herself take a bite of each before handing them to her. And always, Odile would keep her frown intact. "Don't dare be reckless," she would warn.

Odile was supposed to join her this evening for the meal. Since her pregnancy, she never ate alone. Sikander used to come and meet her in the initial days. Alas, his visits were cut down recently. Roshanak hardly saw him. On inquiring, very cautiously, if he was busy with the hazarahpatish regarding palace duties (while she doubted it to be other duties as well) she would know that the Shah was engrossed in affairs of the border. Perhaps there was some tension going on in certain states. Clashes with the governers were a common thing in history.

Roshanak didn't want to disturb him. It wasn't even in her expectations, when she had married him, to receive affection. She was happy to have a husband who smiled at her and never made her feel out of place. He was a very considerate man, who, despite the odd circumstances of their marriage, kept a clarity.

Maybe not complete clarity, but she was no one to judge his choice of a partner. It was saddening that as a man he wanted a man. All three of them were so incomplete.

"Pregnancy does make you think deeply, contrary to what all those men say about how your mind stops working." Odile interrupted her thoughts. She closed the door behind her and sat down beside Roshanak. "They will bring the meal in a moment. I had gone to check it, and I am glad I did. They were putting too much of spice in the food. Persians love spice but it's not healthy for a mother, at least in my perspective. So I asked them to change the dishes."

"I can wait. I had a bunch of grapes a little before, so my tummy is full."

"Don't lie." Odile glared. "A mother's tummy is never full. She always wants to eat and eat."

Roshanak chuckled. "Is that how you were when the Shah lived inside you?"

"Oh yes." She nodded her head vigorously. "If possible, I would have eaten a whole tree of apples, from the bark to the roots. Soil in particular attracted me. So silly, isn't it? The male doctors thought I was insane, but the midwife said it was probably some lack of elements in my body and nothing to worry about. She asked me to eat the soup of silverbeet. It tamed by urge to chew on dirty mud. Still can't figure out how."

"How was your motherhood?"

Odile stiffened. Her cold grey eyes, so icy and formidable, melted like snow. She stared into the distance, oblivious of her surroundings. Reclining against a pile of cushions, she said, "I was blessed by the gods. I had a holy dream when I conceived Sikander, and I believe it is Zeus who is his immortal father."

Roshanak had heard about this dream before. She was surprised to see how the wise Odile was so stubborn about being impregnated by a god. Was that even possible?

"Sikander's mortal father, Philip, appointed many servants in my care. I was treated like a queen and got everything that I wanted. Those nine months were the best nine months of my life." Odile's eyes shimmered with the starry ashes of memories. "But, after Sikander was born, things went downhill."