Not quite the world you know.

Ready, set, let go

Aziraphale's POV

We had sat and laughed for hours until I began to exhaust, my body was still healing, faster than my cells could tear themselves apart. Honestly, I didn't know when it would stop. Crowley had fallen asleep on my shoulders and I myself had begun to feel the edges of exhaustion clouding my mind. I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my mind back out. It wandered away and I found myself thinking on how to get the angels off of our backs.

There wasn't truly any good solution to this problem. There was killing the angels we needed to which made me sick. Killing Puriel had been enough. There didn't seem to be much of a second option in this situation. Really the only way was for me to die. I'd say something but they'd only put me on closer watch. There was no way they would let me do that. Maybe if they were asleep. Crowley would say no. He'd track me down, and never sleep again. My mind raced and I mindlessly petted Crowley's body. I would protect him no matter what, I had lived long enough and if it meant protecting him I'd do anything. I was going to kill myself, it was the only better choice. I was going to go back to heaven, no one would know and they would all move on. A hand waved in front of my eyes and I looked up quickly.

"Sorry?"

"We were just thanking you for saving my life and saying that we better go, it's getting late and they were going to grab dinner," Cas said gently his hand on my knee.

"Oh! Oh, of course, I'm so sorry." I shook my head and looked back at the trio. "You all be safe alright?" They nodded and I smiled standing up Crowley barely moved, he was out like a light. I hugged Cas and shook Dean's hand he smiled warmly and I tugged him just a bit closer. "You take good care of Cas alright?" I said gently in his ear.

"Always, don't say it like you're going anywhere." I pulled away and smiled slightly. His face changed momentarily before he smiled sadly, he knew what I was going to do. I tilted my head and nodded, he nodded back. I turned to Sam who also hugged me.

"It was nice to meet you both. Even after you trapped me in holy oil." I laughed lightly and so did they. Dean was the only one who looked sad. He knew I wasn't coming back, it would all be worth it, they would all be safe, at least as long as I could keep them that way.

"It was nice to meet you too Aziraphale," Sam said and motioned at Dean who nodded.

"Wait for one second Sam I would like to talk to Aziraphale alone." Dean nodded at me, Sam and Cas walked out the door, Cas would get them to the hotel. "You know there are better ways to do this."

"Not in this case." I laughed without humour. "Plus I've been here long enough."

"Cas and Crowley won't move on, I've seen the way he looks at you, it will kill him," Dean said trying to sway my decision.

"No, it won't, I'm killing myself. He may be sad, but at least he will live." I said blocking out my emotions, it wasn't about me anymore, it was about all of them.

"I'm not going to be able to persuade you am I?" Dean said letting his hands fall to his side. I shook my head slightly. He sighed and looked down before actually wrapping his arms around me.

"It will be okay, just get Cas through it and you protect him, you hear me? You protect him." Dean pulled away.

"With my life." I turned. "Aziraphale? I really do love him."

"I know, that's all that matters." I smiled and Dean walked out taking Cas's hand and they were gone. I felt sadness wash over me but it was all for the best. I pulled Crowley off my shoulders with a sad smile and laid him on the couch, then I walked across the room to grab a sheet of paper. Tears fell on the paper as I wrote my last words to Crowley. I finished writing and kissed the letter before moving back to Crowley. I dropped a gentle kiss on his head.

"I love you so much." Those were that last words I spoke to him. The circle lit and I stepped inside, the last thing I saw was my demon laying peacefully asleep on the sofa. A smile crept across my face, and I was seized.

--**--

Crowley's POV

I awoke to a strange cold sensation. I could have sworn I had fallen asleep on Zira. I lazily raised my head and let my body shift back. He was nowhere to be seen. A paper crinkled under my leg. I picked it up and as I read my heart broke farther and farther again. The paper fell to the floor and I ran to a phone, tears spilling from my eyes and the phone rang I hadn't put in a number and in seconds it was picked up. They were on their way.

The letter had read: My dearest Crowley before I step into the portal there are a few things I need to tell you. I have loved you with everything I have to give. You were my heaven and my earth. There had been no moments I regretted, you were my life, from the beginning to the end. I lived because of you and now it seems it is my end. You are worth every single moment of it. I promise I will never regret the decision I made. Now you are not allowed to blame yourself for the decision I have made. I can die, there are so many reasons you can't, the world simply can't go on without you. I can without me. You are the perfect being from heaven, hell, or earth. You are the reason I am still here. I am so glad I was able to love you, something so perfect and yet, you still choose, I will never not love you. I can't say it enough for you to understand. The angels should leave you alone, they won't bother you anymore. I promise. Tell Castiel I loved him as well. Well, I don't have a lot of time, I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. Goodbye Crowley, you are worth the entire world.

My heart pounded, how long had it been? Did we still have time? He couldn't die, he didn't understand. I loved him too much. I couldn't say goodbye. I couldn't say goodbye. The thought rolled over before the door slammed in and Cas barreled in after it. His eyes wild. My blurry from tears.

"What are you doing, time to get him back."

Word count: 1167

I'm so sorry this was really sad to write sorry for the late update, also I cried a bit writing this.