Chapter 21

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                                  Rachel

  Few hours after the ECT, Rachel woke up in her room. She couldn't remember what had happened to her. She was sluggish and found it very difficult to lift her head up from the pillow. Her head was heavy and it hurt like it never did before. The headache was intense. Rachel pressed her hands on her temples and cried out of pain. Her jaw ached and her limbs were sore. Every muscle in her body ached. She couldn't remember what had happened to her. What had caused all this pain? She was confused. Unfocused. She found four pills of different colours on the ground next to her with a plastic cup of water. There were two red pills and two white. She gulped them all at once hoping for the pain to stop. She lied down and stared at the empty wall for more than an hour. Tears rolling down her cheeks.
The door to her room creaked open, but that didn't bother Rachel. She was too tired to turn around, too heavy to move, and in so much pain.

  "Get up Rachel, you have a visitor," said Maria.
  Tears now rolled down even faster at the sound of the word visitor. Rachel was unable to move on her own. Patrick leaned down next to her.
  "Come on Rachel, let me help you up," he said carefully.
  He put most of the effort to lift her up. She was barely able to stand on her own. He rested one of her arms on his shoulders while the second was left to dangle freely. He held her by the waist to support her.
  "Come on now, let's move nice and slow," he encouraged her.

  Rachel looked at him with puffy eyes. She had been crying for over an hour, and her eyes were blood shot red. She must have also busted a vein during the ECT session. The white part surrounding her pupil was all red. He looked back at her with concern, but quickly shifted his gaze towards the path lain before them. Rachel noticed that, but was too fragile to say anything. They walked slowly down the corridor towards doctor Steven's office.

  "Here we are" he said. "Are you ready Rachel?"
  She nodded weakly. He pushed the door open slowly and carefully.

There he was sitting on the chair facing the doctor's table. Kevin had come to see her, but he wasn't wearing Rachel's favourite suit. He wasn't wearing the wine coloured shirt either, and neither was he wearing the tie. He simply came dressed up casually. A navy trouser with a white shirt and rolled up sleeves. His palms were resting on his knees. He quickly stood up at the sight of Rachel.

  "Oh my God! Rachel are you alright?" He approached her and took her in his arms. Just when Rachel thought that her tears have dried up from crying, they fell down like pouring rain. She was unable to wrap her arms around him. She was too weak to do so. Instead, she just cried and rested her head at the comfort of his chest. He smelled different. His cologne had changed. That didn't bother Rachel much because her sense of smell wasn't as strong as it used to be. She was gradually losing all the good things in her life. Her husband, daughter, senses, and her mind. She was losing herself.
  "I am here now my love. Come and sit down." He led her slowly to the other chair facing doctor Steven's desk.

  Rachel could feel doctor Steven's eyes on her. She could feel them targeting her sharply. She sat down facing Kevin.

  "Rachel honey how are you?"
  Rachel smiled mockingly at the question. She wanted to slap him in the face and tell him look at me, the answer is obvious. Instead she just stared back at him. He shifted in his seat and tried once more.

  "Doctor Steven was informing me about your progress. He told me you are doing better now and that you will be out of here soon."
  Rachel couldn't believe it. This was just a visit. He wasn't here to actually take her out of the asylum. He was just there to visit for the first time since she was admitted weeks ago.

  "Doctor Steven said that they still need to monitor you for some time. It won't take much time before all this is over. I promise." He leaned forward and held her hands in his. He didn't feel as warm as he felt when he held her hand back when everything was perfect. This time he felt cold. Very cold. Cold as ice. Rachel pulled her hands away from his. She hated him for not taking her away with him now. She wanted to run out and scream at the top of her lungs. She wanted all this pain to go away. She knew there was no way out. She had to face whatever is coming her way.

  "Kelly?" She asked.
  "She is doing fine. Everything is taken care of. You needn't worry. I didn't get her to see you because...you know..." he trailed off. Rachel watched him closely as he continued.

  "Kelly is in a fragile state now with all the school work and you not being around. If she sees you like this, she would break down. I am sure you wouldn't want her broken would you? It is for the best that you recover first and then come back to us safely. We will be waiting for you." He stretched his arms to hold hers once more. This time Rachel used all the effort she still had and pulled her hands away before he could hold them.

  Rachel looked at Patrick and gestured for him to help her up. She knew she had lost the fight. She looked at doctor Steven and could sense the triumphant look in his eyes. The victory of a villain. She tried so hard to fight off this look, but at the end, she lost and he won.
  "Rachel wait please," pleaded Kevin.
  "We...are...finished...here. Take...me...Patrick."

  Patrick led her back to the room. She spent the whole night crying. At some point she thought that her tears might dry, that no more could come out, but then she was surprised when they rushed down even faster than the previous ones. Rachel knew her enemy was strong. She couldn't stand a chance against a doctor. She was a lunatic, and he was the saviour. People would definitely root for him every time. It was time for plan B.

Time to go home.

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