The Girl With Five Watches

30: What Choice?

"Love is the purest of life. It's what makes life worth living. Love is the most selfless way to live. Some have said that Patrick was the most selfless man the world had ever known. There are those who had questioned it. There is one who claimed that Patrick always knew what was right and always acted upon what he knew what was right to help the one he loved the most."

Never had I realized until that moment that Sara had amazing writing. The opening to her story had me hooked and had me hoping she would be able to finish it. What made this moment all the more special was the fact that we were able to sit under a tree that afternoon on Friday and enjoy each other's company.

"Is that how you see love?" I asked. "Or is that how Patrick sees it?"

She chuckled and laid her hand on my lap. "I don't know. I guess I've seen love a little differently in the last couple of months. Meeting you, I feel like I've learned a little bit about myself."

...

That night, I tried to sleep but I couldn't. Roger was soundly asleep in his bed. He looked peaceful in his sleep as if everything in the world was good. How does he sleep at night? Doesn't he understand what he's doing? Doesn't he understand that he could hurt Karla? Not able to take any more of this, I walked out of my dorm and took a walk around campus. The night was warm. No need for a jacket. The warm night led me to the indoor pool which was apparently open. My eyes had never remembered a form of water so peaceful and calm. Taking off my shoes, my feet stepped onto the steps of the water. 

"What choice are you going to make?" asked the memory of Dr. Parker from our Wednesday Skype Session. "What choice are you going to make?" It kept running through my head over and over until I took a seat with my feet still in the water.

"I'm thinking we should probably turn back," claimed my grandpa that cold winter night. "It might be a little dangerous to cross that river."

"No grandpa. Can't we just cross it? Please?"

After much arguing and convincing, he finally gave in. There was a look hesitation in his eyes, but he was willing to trust my words and my confidence.

It was my choice. I was the one that convinced my grandpa to cross that frozen river when we shouldn't have. I didn't think about the well-being of my grandpa or Emily. All I thought about was myself and how much I wanted to see what my grandpa wanted to show us. Emily could've had a future. She could've done a lot of great things, but it was never going to happen now. Another memory came back to me. It was the memory of the sermon we heard the first time I went to church with Sara.

"See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."

My mind skipped to later in that sermon that I had to listen to online as I kept blanking out that Sunday morning.

"What are we doing to prepare for the future? If we are to look to the future and all that God has prepared us for, we can't dwell on the past and be haunted by it. We must learn and grow from it and be ready for other opportunities that could potentially change our lives just like the previous opportunities that we took that haunt us to this day."

With all the thinking that my brain was doing, I found that I had stripped down and was fully in the pool. It was a little refreshing and I found myself swimming until I got tired. Once my body was tired, it got out of the pool only for my mind to play another trick on me.

"What are you doing Jimmy?" asked Emily who stood there in her swimming suit. "Why aren't you dead?"

"I don't know Emily. You didn't deserve to die."

"No, I didn't deserve to die. Nobody should've died that night or even that day. But two people died because of you. All because you wanted to have your way."

Seconds later, she began growing and looked several years older. I found myself standing next to a house. And I followed Emily inside only to discover Karla on a couch, eating ice cream and crying her tears out. Why was she crying? What was going on with her? Was it something that I did? Or something I didn't do?

"Look at her cry Jimmy," instructed Emily. "She's just as dead as I am. What are you going to do? Are you going to let this happen? Do you want to see her like this? Are you going to let her die like this? Is that who you are? Someone who just lets people die and not do anything about it?"

Why was she crying? Emily wouldn't tell me. But I really didn't want to see her like this. Seconds later, I came back to reality and quickly got my clothes on rushing outside and straight for Sara's dorm late that night. Thank goodness Sara gave me a key. There was no time to waste. Once I got inside their room, my eyes found Karla soundly asleep in her bed and no time was wasted in waking her up.

"What are you doing Jimmy?" she groggily asked. "Are you OK? You need Sara?" 

"Get out of bed, I need to show you something."

She followed me into the common room and sat on the couch. Sara also found herself awake and made her way to the common room curious as to what was going on. Sitting next to Karla, my heart began to speed violent as my shaky hands pulled out my phone.

"Karla, there's something that you need to see."

Jimmy is actually doing it! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Remember to comment, vote, and share!

How is Karla going to react?