"jesus christ." george sighs, leaning his head back on his leather sofa.
we're in his living room, i'm holding his bong, and we're watching the television on mute.
"yeah." i mumble after inhaling the smoke so deep i can feel it in my lungs. "so my life's a mess, i don't know what to do about it anymore honestly."
i don't know what exactly we're watching. some kind of japanese cooking show that george had put on, i suppose he wants to look at good food while we're eating his day-old carbonara.
"your friend just walked out then?" he asks while taking his bong from me. i nod my head a little.
"that's a pretty shitty friend, rhiannon."
"don't lie. i'm the shitty one, i've never told him anything. not about my dead dad, or my awful mum, or my sister. not even about you guys." i frown at myself. "i just thought maybe i could live a different life through him, know what i mean?"
"well," george exhales the smoke out of his nose, making him look like a gentle dragon. "secrets have a way of coming out, don't they?"
a small part of myself feels like he's trying to tell me something.
"i suppose." i mumble quietly, not wanting for it to go any further.
we continue to watch the small japanese woman on the telly in silence.
"looks like she's about to murder that poor tuna with her giant knife." george mutters, sounding confused and pretty much stoned.
i chuckle softly, bringing up my legs to hug my knees. i don't have the energy to say anything.
a little while later, the silence in the room breaks with a loud ringing sound coming from his phone.
i watch as george fumbles for it a few seconds before picking it up.
"hey, jamie."
they talk for a minute while my mind starts wandering for things to do since the pot's starting to hit. i find myself switching the channels on the television instead, alternating between a bland-looking reality tv show and a lifestyle channel with wide-shots of a beach.
suddenly my focus shifts to the loud wail coming from the other line of george's phone.
i turn to him, and his face is suddenly drained of colour.
"jamie, is that him?" he lets out slowly.
i feel the world freeze for at least five fucking seconds.
it's strange how our minds acquire familiarity with the sound of someone crying, because right now i just know who it is and i start to feel like i'm going mad.
"we're—yeah, we're coming over right now. tell him to stay there."
i can't stop my legs from trembling, and my chest feels so fucking tight i can't even breathe.
"george?" i croak. for a short second after dropping the call he doesn't move, staring only at the floor.
just like that i feel everything start to crash down.
"he's relapsed, rhiannon."
—
a/n: :( im sorry
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i think i love you • matthew healy
Fanfiction"you shouldn't have left, you know." "i don't know, matty. i think life's been better when i left you." - sequel to "takes a bit more" -
